Your dearest, Sodapop.

Chapter 3 - why now

      Darry was holding the letter, staring at it. He soon noticed we were there and put the letter done like nothing had happened. Pony looked at me with a confused expression on his face.
"Was that a letter from Soda? What did it say" I asked.
Darry looked to the ground. Me heart was racing. I was terrified. The letter could have said anything. Me and Ponyboy sat on the couch. Darry sighed and passed us the letter.
"We regret to inform you that Sodapop Curtis, did not make it. We wish the best of luck."
I froze. That emptiness I've been feeling, felt even worse. I turned to Pony. We looked at each-other. I then gave him the biggest hug and we cried in each-others arm until we had no tears left.

      After a few weeks had passed, I had done absolutely nothing. I've locked my self in my room, and cried each night. I was at the point where crying was useless. I hadn't felt anything at all, the only thing I felt was loneliness and emptiness. I thought it was selfish of me to stay in my room so I had a shower, got changed, and walked to the Curtis' house. The second I saw it all the memories flooded back more then ever, it was horrible. I couldn't take it. But I did it for Soda.

      I walked in since the door was always unlocked. I saw Darry reading the Newspaper and pony reading on the couch. Two-Bit was in the kitchen and Steve was at home. Darry saw me and ran up and gave me a big bear hug. I felt kinda happy. But that didn't last long. He looked at me and smiled, I could tell it was forced. So I just smiled back. He then said he needed to talk to me, so we went to the kitchen.
"Y/N, I know you're still healing, we all are. But, some guys came to drop off some letters and said to give you your letter first. I'm not sure why but here, read if." Darry said in a calm voice. I took the letter and read it out on the porch.

Dear y/n,

Hey. If you're reading this it's because I didn't make it. I wasn't strong enough. I failed you. I broke our promise. You must be devastated but please don't be. I know it's going to take a long time to heal, trust me I know. But you can't fail me like I failed you. I need you to stay strong. I need everyone to stay strong. I love you so much and believe it or not, I'm probably standing right beside you while you're reading this. I know that sounds cheesy but I hope that's what I'm doing. I hope I'm giving you a big hug. I've wrote you 2 letters. The other one will come soon. I asked for them to drop it off after a few months. I hope you're healed by then. I hope you forgot about me by then and you are happy with a new guy! I hope you're healthy and eating. But besides all that, the reason I wanted to give you the letter first is because I know there's going to be people who won't open the letter. Like Steve. And Dallas. And Johnny. So, I'm asking you to do the biggest favour for me, please make sure everyone reads the letters. I want you to deliver them in this order. Please.
Steve first. He's probably not going to let you in but force it upon him. Make him read it no matter how many try's it takes.
Two-bit nexts. He's probably just as sad as Steve. But he won't be as tricky.
Dallas and Johnny. They need to be together for this one. They won't get anywhere without each other.
Darry. Golly he's probably so upset and hurt. Make sure you comfort him.
Ponyboy. Watch the sunset with him. Then give it. He will be calm and somewhat relaxed so it should be ok.
Lastly. Your other letter. You will read that when you give everyone else theirs. I know I'm asking for a lot but please. Do it for me. I love you more then anything and I want you to know that I'm happy and healthy now! I'm probably with my parents. Gosh I miss them. They are going to help you through everything. They know how much I love you. Please don't push your self. Take you time.

Your dearest, Sodapop.

My eyes turned into water falls.