In this together

late night apologies

You opened your eyes to an empty bed. You glanced around the room to find nothing, no note, not even a piece of evidence that the night before had happened. You pushed yourself up, trying to listen for any noise coming from the rest of the apartment but we're met with utter and complete silence.
You reached over grabbing the pillow from the other side of the bed bringing it to your face and smelling it, and the smell of musk and vanilla filled your nostrils. You sighed as you hugged the pillow tightly in your grasp. At least you knew the night had actually happened.
You fished around the sheets until you found your phone, and you hoped you would have a text, or maybe a missed call. You found it buried beneath the sheets. And unlocked it as your face fell. Nothing.
You felt your heart ache as the worst possibilities started to flood your mind. He regretted it. He regretted it so he left. Left with no explanation. Left you wondering if it was something you did. Maybe something you said.
Then it hit you.
"I just want you, all of you, all the time,"
The words flooded your mind as you recalled saying them the night prior. How could you be so stupid, ruining a perfectly good thing with messy feelings.
You groaned as you got to your feet, definitely feeling the night before in your sore muscles. You grabbed your robe sliding it on as you made your way to the bathroom.
You hated that you felt like a teenage girl, waiting on the boy she liked to call. You weren't this person. You didn't let yourself wonder. You were strong, and you didn't need a man.
But something about Harry made it feel so safe to be weak. To show the softer side of yourself. You hadn't experienced that since you were a kid.
After your parents' disappearance, you were sent to an orphanage, and you didn't have the luxury to be soft. You didn't talk about it often, and if you did it was only to Ruby, who had arrived only a month before you at the same orphanage. Without her, you wouldn't have made it to your 18th birthday. That you know without a shadow of a doubt.
You started the shower and waited as the water warmed. You stared down at your phone at a picture you had of you and Harry from one of the many Sunday brunches you had attended. His mom had insisted you take a picture with his hand on your belly. You smiled big at the camera, as Harry looked at you adoringly.
Months the two of you had been playing this game. Walking on eggshells and avoiding anything that could push your friendship to the next level. 
You knew how you felt. Harry was everything to you. The sound of his laugh was music to your ears. His simple touch would send a tingle down your spine. He knew every time you needed the extra reassurance, he knew the right thing to say, and he knew that sometimes you just needed someone to hold your hand. He knew you almost more than you knew yourself. Yet at the same time, you felt like he didn't know you at all.
You dropped the robe to the ground before climbing into the shower. You let the warm water cascade down your body, relaxing you and soothing your sore muscles from the night before.

You found yourself glancing at your phone repeatedly as you got ready for the day. It was a Monday, and that meant work and so that's what you were going to do. You made it to the set with ease, saying a quick hello to the security guard who you knew as Jack. You made your way to the trailer hopeful, maybe Harry would be there, but were meant with even more disappointment as he wasn't. You set your stuff down grabbing your earpiece and radio and putting them on before going to find agitha, who was the main set designer. 
"Hello my darling," she said as she saw you walking up.
"Hi Aggie," you smiled, looking around at the almost finished trainwreck set. "This is looking amazing," you expressed, shocked with how realistic everything had come out.
"Well I have you to thank for that, you did most of the designing," she chuckled.
"Oh shit up," you giggled rolling your eyes. "When are we filming this part anyway?" You wondered.
"Next week I think. Harry didn't tell you?" She Wondered with raised eyebrows.
You looked at her shocked. "Why would Harry have told me?" You asked.
"You guys just seem close, some of the crew even think that's his," she said, gesturing to your very visible baby bump. It was still little, and if you wore a hoodie could be hidden, but you had chosen a t-shirt and cardigan today, completely forgetting that you hadn't really talked about the whole thing with any of your coworkers.
"Oh," you said. "Well he's my boss, so we're pretty close," you nodded, avoiding the second part of her observation.
"You guys are always gone together, I assume, for baby appointments?" She asked.
"That is-"
"We have seen him rubbing your belly, and he's overly protective of you," she interrupted. "Look, you don't have to tell me, but people talk y/n, and it's getting hard to hide that you are quite obviously pregnant, and you and Harry are just extremely close, if it's not true, just set the record straight," she suggested with a shrug of her shoulders.
You let out a sigh, shaking your head. "It's his," you muttered. You were frustrated, not only was it no one's business, but you knew how people were, and they would make it out like you were sleeping your way up or something, and it wasn't the case at all, and that's why you hadn't felt the need to tell anyone.
"I figured," she chuckled. "So are you guys together then?" She asked.
"I don't think so, I don't know, this whole day has been confusing," you felt yourself getting dizzy as you stood there.
"Y/n, you look pale. Let's sit down," Agitha said as she led you to a chair. "Are you ok," she wondered.
"I don't feel great," you admitted, leaning back.
"Ok y/n.. I'm going to call Harry," she told you. You felt your body getting colder as your eyes drifted shut, the last thing you heard was Agitha's frantic voice as she called Harry.