I'm Always Fine. - Tommyinnit angst

~Chapter 8~

~Tommy's POV~

"...You know the way I can be. Tonight I'm fucking drunk..."

My eyes fluttered open and I immediately sat up in my bed. "Wilbur?" I whispered. I looked around, still groggy. As I went to scratch my head, I felt the air pod in my ear. Oh.

I must have fallen asleep to Wilbur's songs again. Is that weird?

Pfft! Of course it's fucking weird! Why does his stupid voice comfort me so much? Is it normal to find so much comfort in someone else? Is it normal to look up to him, almost like he's my bigger brother? 

I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I glanced over at my clock. 2:36 AM. Yikes. I have a few hours until Phil gets here, maybe I could take a shower? I really should clean myself up... I reluctantly got out of the warmth of my bed and towards my bathroom. 

I brush my teeth for the first time in days. As I ran water on my toothbrush, I decided I should check the hand I sent through the wall. I unwrapped it slowly, grimacing. It still stung, but I had grown numb to the feeling. It was still red and puffy, a yellowish-green color appearing under the skin on my knuckles. My skin gleamed in the bathroom light. 

Could it be infected? I hope not... 

I decided to try and wash my hand with soap and water. That should fix it, right? I rewrap my hand in a bandage, taking a few painkillers. I looked down at the bottle of medicine. 'I should probably bring this with me...' I thought, setting it back on the counter to grab later.

~Time skip - after shower~

I check the time again. 3:58 AM. Jesus, I need to take shorter showers.

I decided to wear a simple hoodie and joggers. It was a long trip, I wanted to be comfortable. As I looked through my bag one last time, I took out my blade. 

I don't need it, right? I've been feeling better! I put the blade back in my drawer, deciding that I would be fine. I don't need it.

I grabbed my backpack and suitcase and set them down next to the front door. I plugged my phone into the wall to make sure it was charged, constantly checking it for any texts from Phil. 

After the 900th check, my phone dinged. 

Philza

-I'm outside!

I froze. He's outside. Phliza's here! I get to see all of my friends! I'll get to meet Dream, Karl, Sapnap, Techno, and everyone else! I smiled brightly and got off the couch. 

"Mom, I'm leaving!" I shouted, listening for a response. 

"Wait, wait!" She shouted back. She ran into the living room with her phone in hand, pointing the camera towards me. "I need a picture! Your first trip to America!" She gushed, snapping a few pictures.

"Mooom! I gotta go!" I groaned. I smiled anyway, giving the camera a thumbs-up. 

"Oh, come here and give me a hug!" She cried, running up and hugging me. "I'm gonna miss you, Tom. Stay out of trouble, please?"

"I won't get in trouble, mom." I chuckled, hugging her back.

I heard a car horn outside so I quickly said another goodbye and grabbed my bags. I reached for the door handle but stopped. Thousands of 'what ifs' consumed my thoughts, making me feel anxious. I shook my head. I will not let these negative thoughts ruin this for me.