I'm Always Fine. - Tommyinnit angst

~Chapter 11~

~Phil's POV~

I watched as Wilbur and Tommy spoke, barely making out any words. I caught mine and others' names but that was about it. 

Wilbur stood up and quickly sat next to me. I glanced at Tommy, tears making his skin glisten in the light from the window. I looked back at Wil, a stern look on his face. 

"Mate, you guys alright?" I whispered.

He didn't respond. 

"I can't help if you don't tell me what's up." I muttered, looking back at Tommy. His blank expression made me feel extremely uneasy.

"We got into an argument, that's all." Wilbur responded, pulling out his phone and opening Discord.

I sighed, knowing that was the last question he would be answering. I pulled out my own phone and opened Twitter, reading tweets from fans and my friends. This typically nice activity didn't help me feel any better about my friends right in front of me, however.

I pulled up messages with Tubbo to try and figure some things out. I know he and Tommy were in a little fight, but Tubbo would still care about his friend. Especially if he was crying.

Philza

Hey tubs, could you check in on tommy for me?

Tubbo

y?

Philza

he and wil just got into a fight

look ik you and tommy arent on the best of terms but im worried abt him

Tubbo

he got in a figt w wilbur? whst happened?

Philza

idk, wilbur and him were whisper/yelling at eachother and both of em looked upset

Tubbo

ok ill chekc on him

~Tubbo's POV~

I looked up from my phone and over at George, who had fallen asleep a long time ago. I glanced through the seats at Tommy. His blank expression caused a pit to form in my stomach, guilt planting itself into my brain.

"Tommy?" I whispered. He glanced at me curiously. 

"What?" He replied, not looking away from me.

"Can I sit with you?" I smiled.

He reluctantly nodded, moving his backpack from the empty seat next to him. I quickly got up from my seat and sat beside him, glancing over at Wilbur and Phil.

Phil smiled and held a thumbs up. I smiled back and then turned my attention to Tommy, who didn't seem interested in talking to me at all.

I fiddled with my fingers, awkwardly looking up at him every now and then. I need to work on my socializing skills.

"Do you want something?" He muttered, scrolling through Instagram.

"Uh- no, well yes, but no- maybe?" I stuttered, covering my face with my hands.

It was quiet for a moment before he started to laugh. I looked up at him and smiled. If my embarrassment made him smile, then so be it. 

"Big man, I've gotta teach you how to speak English." 

"I know how to speak English." I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

And there it was, the playful banter that I've missed so much. It's been so long since he and I talked that I'd forgotten what our friendship used to be like.

I didn't mean to drift away from Tommy, but Ranboo and I had just been so busy with recent lore and planning a meetup that I hadn't even noticed we had grown distant. 

I suddenly felt ashamed. How could I do that to him? No wonder he doesn't like Ranboo, he feels like he's been replaced. 

"So what's up?" He asked, mindlessly scrolling through his Instagram feed.

"Oh, just wanted to check in. I felt kinda bad you were left by yourself."

"Thanks, but I really don't mind. I've had so much going on that it's nice to be alone for once," he explained. He quickly looked up at me after a moment of silence. "Not that I mind you sitting with me-"

I laughed and reassured him that I knew what he meant. We talked for a little while before I began to yawn every five minutes.

"You should go to sleep." Tommy said.

"I'm not tired." I replied, yawning another time.

"So you're yawning because you think I'm boring?" He gasped, dramatically putting a hand to his chest.

"I didn't say that!" I laughed, hitting him with my neck pillow. 

We chatted a little longer before I began to drift off to sleep.

~Tommy's POV~

I sighed contently, momentarily forgetting about my situation with Wilbur. I could worry about that later. I finally had my best friend back. I rested my hand in my hoodie pocket, feeling the plastic of the shaving razor. I know I keep saying this, but maybe now I can finally get rid of it.

I took one out of the pack of 6 and shoved it in my backpack's side pocket. Just in case.

I stood up out of my seat and went back to the stuffy airplane bathroom, switching the lock behind me. I took out the pack and stared at its bland blue packaging. Even if I do end up doing it again, at least I can say I threw the ones I had out. Most of them, anyway.

I unraveled a long stretch of toilet paper and wrapped it loosely around the plastic package. I tossed the TP present into the metal bin and collapsed on the toilet lid. 

Let's try this one more time.

-------------------------------------------

Hey readers! Sorry I've been gone for so long. I can't believe it's been a year since I first started this. So much has happened. 

I relapsed in July and I just started spiraling from there. I couldn't get out of my bed for days. But once school started I was given a reason to be motivated again. :) 

I met some nice people and made new friends, along with a boyfriend who I love very much<3

Now that I'm back, I'll be able to write new chapters! So enjoy, and thank you for reading!

~938 words~