To: Her

Touch

As decades went by, I can feel the cold hand of your fingers
Grazing my face softly and lifting it 
I ached in pain
And love
Was it?
Days pass by
I yearned
For you
For your love
For your care
For your heart
For your touch
I was only a little girl
Who wanted
To feel
Who wanted
To be loved
I remembered
The way you smiled at me
The way you patted my hair
Like a little cat
Obedient
And
Quiet
Not knowing what to do
Clueless eyes that knew to submit
That was your favorite kind
As you thought cats were silent
Only kept at night
I disrupt your fantasy slowly
I did it for you
in return
You wanted touch
I wanted love
Mistakes or was it a crime?
Years gone by
I craved for it
I didn't understand why
Was it because you took it
Or did I want a sense of control
I always wanted to fill this emptiness within me
That been dull
Gray
And
White
Not as pure as a snow can be
When you left
The wound opened a waterfall of colors
Red
Blue
Then, purple
It was a fucked up palette
I kept sinking deeper each day
The bucket turned all brown and green
Never pure as before
No matter what I do
I wish it was all pure again
What happened to us?
To me and the little girl I was
i snapped out of it
We, both snapped
Endless of hours,
Washing it
all the trails of red kept spreeing out
No matter how much we wash
We cleaned
It was always stained
Of shutters
Screams
Mumbles
Scratches
If only my little self and I were both separate
I would've protected you little one
-
Broke