Colorblind [h.s]

23

"Yes, please," I smile.

I watch as he gets up and heads over to the fridge to grab another bottle.

"Big Pinot Noir fan are we?"

"Is it that obvious?" I laugh.

"Considering your fridge consists of only- let's see, yeah- 5 bottles of it and...  cheese? Yes, it is obvious. Also, you need to go grocery shopping," he says as he opens the bottle, walking back over to me.

"Well there you go. And I know, I'll get around to it."

I sit quietly as he pours us two more glasses and the end credits of Pretty Woman continue to play. I can feel the slight awkwardness cascade over the room and most definitely do not want the vibe to be killed.

"I'm gonna play some music," I blurt.

"Can I pick the song?"

I nod and hand him my phone and silently thank Bella for getting surround sound for our apartment. Only now do I notice the ambience in the room- the main light is off, leaving only the decorative lights strung up around the living room. Slightly romantic but also comfortable.

"A big town,"

"Synthetic apparitions of not being lonely,"

I look up as the opening line of She's American by The 1975 plays, locking eyes with him.

"Seems a bit fitting, no?" he asks with a small smile.

"Seems a lot fitting. I really like this song."

"Yeah? Lucky choice I guess. I queued up more of them."

"Good, they're great," I say.

"Agreed. What's your favorite song by them?"

"It's hard to choose, but probably Somebody Else. I love it."

"Love? And what about the song constitutes such a word from you?"

"Well, it's beautiful and tragic at the same time. How he wants her enough to miss her but not enough to tell her the truth."

"The truth?"

"Yeah, the truth- about how he feels. How he doesn't want her enough to give effort but how it kills him to see her with someone else. He ruins it for himself and it's devastating. But I love it for some reason. It's beautiful," I explain, looking down at my hands.

"Good thing it's the next song on my queue then," he grins as he brings the glass to his lips once again.

I don't know what to say next, so I don't say anything. Even if I did know what to say, I don't think I would've said it. I'm too focused on him.

I'm definitely feeling all the Pinot I've consumed tonight because I can't seem to tear my eyes away from his lips, and I don't even care if he notices. I just want to kiss him.

And before my more rational, sober side can overthink it and how it's probably a horrible idea that I'm going to regret tomorrow, I'm leaning into him and pressing my lips to his.

I can tell it catches him off guard at first because I can feel him freeze, but he quickly recovers and begins to kiss me back.

Our mouths move in sync; both slow and tender at first, testing the water, and then fast and feverish, like we can't get enough of each other. My hand instinctively flies up to his curls as I climb onto his lap and straddle him. He lets out a groan and balls his fists into my hair, and I deepen the kiss when I feel him start to harden beneath me.

I can't help but smirk at how easy it was to turn him on.

I kick it up a notch and begin to grind against him, trying to let him know without words how badly I want this. How badly I want him. He parts his lips and I take the opportunity to slip my tongue between them, tasting the wine. His hands leave my hair and fly down to my hips to help guide my movement, his thumbs biting into my hip bones to keep me steady on top of him.

I can feel his rings dig into my skin and find myself excited to see the marks later. Something tells me they'll be the only proof that this is actually happening.

He moves his hands to lift up my shirt, and breaks the kiss only for a second to take it completely off, leaving me in only my bra and pajama shorts. My entire body is on fire, ignited with pleasure that grows with each grind of my hips and breathless moan that tumbles out of his mouth.

In one swift motion, he grabs my ass and flips us over so that I'm laying across the couch and he's hovering above me, one hand by my head to support him and the other lightly squeezing my neck.

He releases his grip on my neck to move his hand over his back and pulls his shirt over his head, revealing even more tattoos. I look down to examine them, only seeing what looks like a butterfly before he's grabbing my jaw, bringing my mouth back to his.

He breaks our kiss and moves my head to the side, allowing him to softly kiss my neck. I wince as I feel him suck harshly, but quickly feel his tongue soothe over the spot. The way he's kissing all over me is completely opposite of how he's touching me- his kisses are rough but his touch is gentle. The juxtaposition here is driving me absolutely insane.

I can't even hear the music anymore over the sound of our heavy breathing.

He picks his head back up, moving his hand to cup my face.

"Look at you," he says, swiping his thumb over my lips as he examines my face. I stare up at him panting, waiting for him to finish his thought.

"So beautiful," he whispers before kissing me, hard.

I can feel the pressure continue to grow in between my legs as I lift my hips up in a desperate attempt to get some sort of relief. He lightly laughs against my lips as he pushes himself down harder on me, reading my body perfectly.

My mind is spinning as I try to keep up with his relentless pace that he's kissing me at. I can't seem to catch my breath and my mind is growing fuzzier by the second when I feel his hands cup me through my shorts. I can tell that any second now we're either going to be ripping the rest of each other's clothes off right here or he'll be taking me to my room to do so.

As excitement floods my body, I feel him harshly pull away and lift himself off me.

This is the second time he's cock blocked me.

I look up at him in confusion, moving my body back upright. I feel my cheeks grow redder by the second with embarrassment.

I knew this was a bad idea.

He's standing now, running his hands through his hair and very obviously turned on.

I cross my arms over my chest in an attempt to cover myself as I bring my legs up as well. I touch my mouth, feeling his kiss haunt my lips.

"I'm sorry, I- I shouldn't have kissed you, I-" I mumble, watching him put his shirt back on.

"No. It's not you. It wasn't- uh. It was good. It was, um- I liked it, clearly. I just um, yeah I've gotta go."

He won't even look at me.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I just- um I'll be back tomorrow," he says as he grabs his jacket.

"Okay- why? Is everything okay?" I ask.

"You're dealing tomorrow, remember? I'll pick you up at 8," he says as he walks out the door, leaving me alone and embarrassed as the music continues to play.