Blame Gravity

Chapter 10

February ends before I can catch my breath. 

Today is March 4. Life is like it was in February. It's awkward around James, I'm having lovely dates with Mike, I.T. practices are every Thursday (and they're going very well, too), Layla is still my best friend, and my little sister keeps interrupting me while studying, forcing me to move to the library. 

We haven't worked on the project since that Tuesday.  We should, though. The deadline is in a week. Why did Ms. Rodriguez give so much time? It isn't even a hard assignment. Well, it's not like I'm upset about it. Quite the opposite, actually.

French is annoying as always, English is dull, and Math is quite interesting. James and I have kind of gone back to our usual rivalry, and we try outperforming each other, and it's going incredibly well (for me). James keeps smiling at me like an idiot whenever one of us gets something right. After class, I walk up to him.

"What are you doing, Miller?" I hiss.

"Rushing to Spanish," he says, and he's about to leave, but I grab him by his sleeve. He looks up at me, and our eyes meet. What is this feeling I have every time I touch him? Does he have it too? Nevermind. It's not important.

"No. I mean, why do you smile like that? Why aren't you angry at me for getting something right, like usual?" 

I can see him hesitate. Finally, he leans close, and whispers, "You know exactly why, Canmore." His warm breath against my neck gives me shivers, and he leaves before I can think better of it.

What the fuck? Why does he bully me like this? Because this is bullying. He is taking advantage of my attraction toward him, and he uses it to humiliate me. He's pretending to feel the same way so that he can ridicule me later. That's bullying.

I  shake my head, trying to get out the negative thoughts. James doesn't care about me, and I don't care about him either. And that's a good thing. It would just prevent us from competing.

After French, I run to the Spanish classroom, to wait for James. He walks out of the classroom, laughing with his friends, and Mike. When Mike sees me, he runs up to me and kisses me on the cheek. This is not what I came here for! But it's alright. He puts his arm around me.

"Hey, beautiful," he says. I smile.

I look at James. He's frowning, but one of his friends says something, and he laughs, seemingly forgetting that I'm even there. 

"Ready for  our date?" Mike asks. 

Oh. Fuck.

"Uhm, I was actually here to talk to James," I say, a bit louder so that he can hear it too. James looks up, surprised.

I see the disappointment on Mike's face, and I feel terrible. "Sorry," I whisper. "We have a project, and, uh, we kinda have to work on it. The deadline is close, you know?"

"Yeah, no problem." He turns to James. "Take good care of her, okay?" He pats him on the back and walks away.

James smiles, and when he's gone, he rolls his eyes. He then looks at me and beams. "So, Canmore?"

"We should work, you know? I mean, we haven't done anything about the project since-" I stay silent, and I feel my cheeks heat. 

He clears his throat and then gestures me to come with him. We go to his house. It feels strange to be in his room again. It almost hasn't changed, except the pile of drawings grew in size. I decide not to look at them, because he'll get angry again. I stare at the ceiling.

"So... are you a Sagittarius?" I finally ask.

"Yeah. December 10."

Life Path 1. The leader archetype. Competitive, likes dating around. Fuck.

"And you?" he asks.

"I'm a Cancer," I quickly say. 

He nods awkwardly. "Ah. I figured." He smiles in that idiotic way only he can.

"Fuck you, Miller," I say, and I sit down on the pouf.

"Already did." It stays silent after that. He clears his throat. "Sorry," he mumbles, and he sits down next to me, careful to keep an appropriate distance. 

I burst out laughing. "Oh, that was terrible," I say, unable to stop laughing. "It's so bad it's good."

He smiles and snorts quietly. When I finally stop chortling, we start working. 

I like this. It's not as uncomfortable as at first, and at least we get something done. 

When we're finished with the website, we take a break. He brings snacks and some Coke. We're eating and drinking and we accidentally touch hands while reaching for a crisp. We quickly pull our hands back and wipe them off.

"Let's start the pitch," I quickly say, and stand up.

"Come on, man! Just relax. We worked really hard. We deserve a break." He leans back in his chair and takes a sip of Cola. 

I roll my eyes. "Is this how you work?"

"Yes."

"Now I understand why I'm better than you." 

He stands up. "What was that?" An annoying smirk plays on his face. 

I repeat myself. 

"You sure, little Cancer?"

I am about to smack him on the head, but he catches my hand and pulls me in. It's incredibly awkward for a moment, and all I can think about is his soft lips on mine, unable to function until I reach that sweet, sweet sense of comfort. 

"What are you doing?" he asks, still smiling.

"Kiss me," I whisper before I can stop myself.

He raises his eyebrows. "What?"

"Kiss me."

And he does.

It feels like magic. But then, he pulls away.

"Lucy, I..." It's silent for a moment, both of us trying to catch our breaths. "I can't stop thinking about you."

"Me neither," I whisper. Our lips clash, and he kisses me roughly.

"Fuck, Lucy," he mumbles in between kisses. Why do I keep doing this? It's wrong, so wrong.

He pushes me down on his bed and gently grabs me by the waist. I get aroused just at his touch and I spread my legs. He kisses my neck and he's about to go farther down when my phone rings.

"Fuck," I mumble as I go to pick it up. It's Mike. Oh, no.

"Hi, Mike," I say, trying to sound normal. It's hard, trying to catch my breath.

"Hey, Luce! How's the project going?" he asks in his usual excited voice. I feel terrible.

"Yeah, g-... great." I rest my hand in my back pocket.

"What, did you just do 100 pushups or something?" he asks, chuckling.

"Uh, well, you know-... New brainstorming technique... Working out helps to-... uh, release certain chemicals, that, you know." None of that is true (I think, at least), and I hear James snort behind me. I pray that Mike believes it.

"Oh really? Guess I'll try it out sometime. Well, I've gotta go, I was just checking in with you. Bye, Luce, good luck!"

"Thanks, bye." I put my phone in my pocket. I turn around and look at James. He's stood up in the meanwhile, and he's still breathing heavily.

"Great excuse, 'Luce'. Working out releases certain chemicals." He laughs.

"Shut up!" I say, and I feel my cheeks heat. "I had to think of something."

"No, I mean, it's true. Working out does channel creativity. It's just that he's so fucking oblivious." He snorts.

"I'm sorry, James, I have to go." I pick up my bag and I am about to storm out of his room, but he grabs my arm.

"Stay," He looks desperate. "Please."

I shake my head. "Take me home."

He inhales sharply and nods. "Fine. Let's go."