Tribulation [h.s]

27

"When I wake up, I'm afraid
Somebody else might take my place
When I wake up, I'm afraid
Somebody else might take my place."

-

Fear tournaments me. It paralyzes me. It creeps up my throat, poisons my blood, and crawls over my trembling skin.

"N-Niall-"

"What did you do?"

"W-What are you talking about?!" He's touching me. His arm is bent at a ninety-degree angle and presses into my chest, right under my throat, pinning me against a wall. Cold metal pressed to my temple, and my blood freezes throughout my whole body as I went stiff. I'm trapped.

"Niall, get off of her!" Candy yells to the blonde, her hands covering her mouth in utter shock. Meanwhile, Harry remains on the couch, drinking and quietly observing.

"I saw you," Niall grunts out. "You were running over to us, screaming for Harry. Then, a bomb just so happened to go off in the pit where you were at!"

"Wait- you think I had something to do with what happened?"

Candy speaks before Niall can. "Niall, I told you she didn't do anything! She didn't even know there was a race tonight until ten minutes before I showed up!"

I know Niall doesn't like me very much, but I never thought he'd be the one to slam me up against a wall and hold a gun to my head. "Then how did you know there was a bomb, huh?"

"I-I didn't!" I defend myself, but it's hard to think straight with him touching me. Get off, get off, get off. "T-There was a man, and he started talking to me! I just- I had a feeling something bad was going to happen, okay?!"

I turn my head and look away at how Niall laughs in my face. Too much has happened tonight; too much is going on through my head.

Ears ringing, skin burning, vision blurred, mind racing-

Too much. Everything is too much right now.

I snap. "Get off me!"

"Not until you answer my question!"

Before the tears come and the screaming begins, Niall's body is ripped away from me, and his lack of closeness allows me to breathe again and steer clear from the bridge of panic I nearly fell off of.

It was like Niall had his hands wrapped around my throat and watched the life slowly drain from my eyes. Even when he lets go, and I start gasping for air, every rapid breath I take feels so heavy. It's not an unfamiliar feeling, though; it's a feeling that comes with exhaustion and my lack of will to keep moving forward.

To keep living.

This is a feeling I push back frequently. I have people I love that keep me going, but that doesn't change how I feel.

Breathing is hard, and sometimes I don't want to do it anymore.

When I'm able to focus again, I realize that it was Harry who ripped Niall from me, and he looks-

God, he looks angry.

"The fuck is your problem, Horan? Didn't you hear her tell you to get off of her?"

Niall looks offended. "You're seriously checking me right now? You let her live, and she's been nothing but trouble, don't you see that? She's a liability! How are we supposed to believe anything she says? I mean- bloody hell! You were shot!"

"She didn't do anything," Harry says plainly, looking remarkably unamused.

"And how do you know that?" Niall challenges. "What evidence do you have?"