Vampire and Prejudice

Chapter 17 - Darcy

I left Bingley to suffer in London—what better place to drown one's sorrows—and traveled back to Pemberley. The only consolation was that we had done all we could to prevent him from even more suffering, being shackled to a girl who was beautiful and kind—easy characteristics that would not stand the test of time. Those manacles also came with other burdens: family that was mostly insufferable, connections that would hardly help any offspring that might result from the union, and overall bitterness that would eventually surround the marriage. Our considerations were just. Now we needed to let Bingley weather his feelings like a terrible illness. That was all that love was, after all.

Pemberley welcomed me with open arms; Georgiana rather less so. She looked better than I hoped, however, which was as much as I could ask. Finally home, finally at peace, and finally with no undue distractions to gnaw at my sanity.

"Brother," Georgiana greeted me. I did not offer her my hand, and she did not move to take it. There was an accustomed distance between us, which was to be maintained at all times. It was one of the reasons that the Bennets had troubled me so. Their boisterous ways and ease with each other were entirely foreign to me. "Welcome home."

Georgiana's usual collected reserve gave way to a slight frown on her face. Was it my miserable presence that had caused it? She soon schooled her expression into an unreadable mask. I followed her example, avoiding any worry that might enter my face: if she thought I was worried, she would worry about me being worried, and I would worry about her worrying about me being worried about her, and it would go on and on and on.

"You look well," I said as my sister moved to the pianoforte, not seeming particularly eager for any news I might impart from London or Hertfordshire.

"Are you surprised, brother?" She moved her fingers lightly over the keys, teasing out a perfect combination of sounds.

Indeed, I was—pleasantly—surprised. Relieved, even. My fear over her well-being would never truly cease for as long as I would live. It was a feeling of responsibility I had gained when I was a boy presiding over a befrocked bundle of a blond creature on wobbly feet, and it had only grown since then, especially after I had seen the depths of misery that my charge could submerge herself in.

"Not at all. I have full confidence in your seamstress."

"I am rather curious that you have come alone." Georgiana looked at me with eyes that related a slight disappointment. It was not my face then that had caused her displeasure. Good. Or possibly very bad, depending on who she might have wished to see next to me.

"Bingley and his family will join us for Christmas. For now, they are engaged in all that London has to offer." Those were the enjoyments Georgiana cared nothing about, cared not to experience. Even though she looked well and acted with composure, she was not well enough to be pushed in any direction she was not willing to go—to the bustling streets and rooms full of strangers, for example.

"That is not who I mean. I was thinking of a fresh face I was convinced you might bring for me to see," Georgiana said, and I fought to maintain a careful neutrality on my face.

It was my fault, really. I had written to her about Miss Elizabeth in the most endearing of terms, and though I had censored my feelings in my report, I had given an impression that her friendship would be beneficial to Georgiana. A horrible mistake on my part, of course. Especially now. Especially with Bingley's heart bleeding out over Miss Bennet. If my friend had not been so eager to throw caution to the wind and convince himself of that dream of marriage, I might have persuaded Georgiana to visit Hertfordshire.

Naturally, she would have been under no obligation to leave the grounds of Netherfield Park, but there were a few gentle ladies I would encourage her to meet if she was willing. Miss Bennet, her unfortunate family notwithstanding, was soft and quiet in her manners, and it was perfectly probable that she might spend a pleasant afternoon with Georgiana, giving her a wonderful opportunity for female companionship. And maybe seeing Miss Elizabeth would give Georgiana a worthy example and friend to gently challenge her fears in the most patient terms possible.