Vampire and Prejudice

Chapter 27 - Darcy

Done with the morning letters, I was eager to get out of the house and air my frustration. Not that they contained something that vexed me—it was rather the absence that bothered me. Bingley still had not written back to me after I had expressly asked him to come to Pemberley. Twice. There might have been some mistake, and Bingley might have not gotten the letters, but I thought it likely that something else was afoot entirely: that Bingley had in fact received the beckoning and ignored it or had ceased to bother with the post altogether. I thought Miss Bingley would have been more attentive to his business, but I could not fault her for letting some things slip through the cracks. Even though the letters were from me. Even though I really wanted to fault her very much and express my deep dissatisfaction with how she ran things.

Of course, one must not forget that Bingley's predicament was of my own making and his continual drowning in his misery was also my doing. Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst would not say a thing to relieve his suffering because his happiness was of a kind that would only injure them. It was down to me if I wanted to see a change one way or another, but I feared what it might mean for me. It was probable that I would lose his friendship, and if he went to Hertfordshire and secure Miss Bennet, I would have to stew in my utter misery that I was no longer welcome to be by his side and by extension would not have a single chance to meet Miss Elizabeth again. A dreadful excuse and the world is welcome to hate me for it.

At night—I was once again sleeping less than I should, but at least my blood consumption was at a tolerable amount—I often thought of different schemes that could result in my seeing her again: I could haunt Rosings on a permanent basis; I could befriend Mrs. Collins and ask her aid in the matter; I could purchase Netherfield and be a constant pest in that neighborhood and Miss Elizabeth could scarcely avoid me then. I should not, of course. It was too soon to seek a meeting with the lady of my heart when she professed her hatred of me just a few months ago. I must wait a couple of years until it simmered down to a dislike before I approached her with any intentions. I might as well be asked to wait for centuries—time without her was excruciating. Attempting to pass the time and ease my suffering, I tried my best to be vexed by her behavior and find fault in how she had treated me. My best was not good enough. Truth be told, I would forgive her for anything.

I considered walking the grounds, but decided on riding. I was promised great exercise with the new mare and was not disappointed as I rode through the Pemberley Wood, leaving the river behind me, and my annoyance slowly dissipated into a more manageable condition. It would not do to walk around a gloomy storm cloud ready to strike down anyone who would come across me with my stare alone.

I returned via a comparatively narrow path with a river on the one side and a line of trees on the other, which normally left me with enough space, but not with a small party of people strolling along it. My choices were as follows: to ride them down, stop and wait until they had passed, or dismount my horse and walk a little while with them until the road opened up again. This was part of an accustomed circuit for the visitors to Pemberley, who were free to roam the grounds until dusk. We had too much of the park to ourselves and we seldom used it not to let others admire it in leisurely excursions. Besides, it gave the head-gardener more satisfaction to know that his work was appreciated.

I dismounted before I had come too close, but their pace was slow enough for me to catch up with them easily. "Good day."

"Good day," a gentleman answered me, his good mood all over his face. A lady next to him looked less cheerful and more tired, while the third of their party was Miss Elizabeth.

I stared, then remembered to blink and as I did, tried to blink away the vision that was before me, but it remained solid, dressed in summer fashions and as spectacularly beautiful as ever. She was indeed before me, and if I had any doubts, her shy greeting dispelled all of them.