Broken hearts

Chapter 21

-Jude-

How do you know your heart is broken? Can anyone break your heart? Does it have to be someone really important to you? Because Noah and I were nothing, and still, he managed to hurt me.

I got a message from him this morning, he wanted to talk before school, after all we couldn't at the Halloween's party; I don't want to see him right now, I don't think I would be able to stay calm or at least indifferent in front of him, I don't want him so see me breaking. I haven't talked to Anni all Sunday, she still thinks I'm upset because something bad happened with Riley at the party, and I'm not planning to explain the real reason of my mood.

I managed to get as late for school as I could, I got yelled by my father and Anni but it was worth it, at least I had an excuse to avoid Noah; I got to the classroom and it looked like no teacher was there, because everybody was out of their seats, talking and playing, I sat at my desk and took out my headphones to listen to some music that could improve my mood.

"Now I can't say goodbye if you stay here the whole night
You see, it's hard to find an end to something that you keep beginning
Over and over again
I promise that the ending always stays the same
So there's no good reason in make believing that we could ever exist again I can't be your friend, can't be your lover
Can't be the reason we hold back each other from falling in love
With somebody other than me"

I admit I was about to cry, I guess the music didn't help at all; before getting too emotional someone interrupted my thoughts sitting in front of me.

"Are you better?"; Riley asked without using that kind tone I've always liked, I took off my headphones gave her a fake smile.

"Yeah, I don't remember anything from the party, I guess I was too drunk"; I lied, I can't talk about it now and Riley might be the last person I would ever talk to about this.

"Jude you weren't drunk"; she affirmed.

"Yes I was"; I said getting a bit defensive.

"Look, I came to talk to you to know if you were ok because you seemed really upset on Saturday; but also because I deserve an explanation of what's going on here, with you and with us"; I'm sorry Riley... I didn't want to be mean to her, but it was the only way to make her forget about what I said and get her off  my feet.

"With us? Well I thought we were having fun, you like me and I like you and that's the only thing you should know; if you don't want to accept that I was drunk that night then that's your problem, but I won't talk about what you think I said. If you want to finish this then that's fine with me, but I suggest you to forget what I may said at the party 'cause no one will believe a thing you say"; I'm an awful person

"Fuck you"; she said and stood up leaving me alone again, before I could do anything else I got a new message, it was Noah again.

Meet me in the bathroom in ten minutes please.

Why won't he understand that I'm done with this shit...

Anyway I decided to go, if he won't understand my hints then I'll have to be clear with him, the teacher wasn't here yet, and maybe she won't arrive anytime soon, so it's now or never. I waited exactly ten minutes before standing up and start walking to the bathroom; when I got there Noah was already in, he saw me and came closer to me right away.

"Hey... I thought we were going to meet this morning"; why are you talking like you didn't do anything wrong?!

"I was late..."; I didn't want to see your fucking beautiful face