Jackie Earnie Vs. The Evil Eight

Jackie Earnie Lore recap

Jackie Earnie was floating through space for a long time. The universe was collapsing in on him and he was like "Man this sucks." The universe collapsed and bam. He felt the big bang and was in a new room. "Jackie Earnie!" A man who was a man wearing clothes said. 

Jackie Earnie looked at the people in the room. He remembered them from the last universe. 

Al co Hol. Simply known as Al co Hol. Team healer If he makes a bet and is right someone is revived by chance. He also has a sub ability called Tahiti time which has a 1 in 1 Vigintillion chance of activating. If it did he would teleport to anywhere in the universe he can't control this but he's always lucky. Used to have a power that had the first ability with Alcohol poisoning but he had alcohol poison immunity so those powers didn't work. He's my number 2 or as we say in America he's my number 2.

Eliot IfIFalloffofabuilidingIwontdieduetothefactIhaveasuperpowerpreventingmefromsustainingfalldamage. His name is what his power is. Any fall damage he can't die from. He also has a second power of being able to go down a ladder at light speed and for every planck he goes down it doubles his speed. He was a guy who was just there.

Federal Governments Hate Him !! Mr. !! (he gets really angry if you pronounce the !! with a z like most people do.) He has the ability to make anything untraceable as along as no one has seen it heard of it tasted it felt it or smelled it. This applies to himself as well so he has no sense capability in his entire body. He has overcome this though. 

Peter Papernotcut. He has 2 abilities. He can't get a papercut and he can't drown in Lemon juice. Any sugar and it becomes lemonade and he starts to drown. 

Cheese Winchester Mac-11 Stapler. He is a man who was cursed by a wizard to have his life force tied to a Toyota Prius. He also has the ability to climb the corporate ladder instantaneously. 

Quackie Learnie. He is a clone from me but his face is one of those poorly disguised mustache glasses. He has no other powers other than he has my power of Space time manipulation immunity. 

Captain Battle. He is a famous Hero. The worlds Most famous hero ever. His catchphrase is "Villians I will Rape you!" His power is he can make anyone fight him but if he gets in a fight even if he wins he dies. 

I look at who is looking at me. he looks at me. "I am your commander." Your Commander was a famous Military general. he's leading this group but for what reason? I grab the script and start looking. Al steps on my shoe. "We don't take kindly to Vampires in this operation!." He held 3 fingers up. He spit on my face. Number 1 we don't take kindly to people with powers. Number 2 I don't like Vampires they're all freaky. Number 3 They don't show up in Mirrors like who does that? What kind of thing has no reflection? Number 4 I don't like what you're wearing?"

I look at my clothes. I start to describe them when the narrator tells me I can't since this series works better as a purely text idea. "Well I think they're good." I say to him. Al just glares at me. Then he fluorenes at me. Then he glows at me. Then he walks away still awkwardly glowing. His pinky won't change color for whatever reason. It's kind of embarrassing for him.

Jackie Earnie then says. "Well at least I don't have an opaque finger that won't glow when I try to intimidate someone." "Oooooooh." Everyone in the room took this as a  challenge to Al co Hol. Federal walks in between us. "Gentlemen." "We need to work out our differences." "Jackie...Earnie was it?" Jackie Earnie responds "I want to be called..." "Yes I know Jackie Earnie." "You wish to be called Jackie Earnie." "Isn't that right Jackie Earnie?" Jackie Earnie Nodded. I love being called Jackie Earnie.

Earnie Shmernie! Al co hol whispered. "Enough!" Your yelled at us. "Jackie give me 20! AL give me 20 as well!." Me and Al both gave him 20 bucks. "That's better." "Jackie Earnie You are tasked with fighting down a group who's intentions are not quite known by us yet. The Evil Eight." You are going to go with.....mmmmmmm. He started to do eenie meaniey miney moe. to decide. He put his hand over his face and opened his two fingers to look.