Jackie Earnie Vs. The Evil Eight

76 Percent

I'm 76 Percent. I'm going to get my drivers license renewed. I stand in line. I poke the guy behind me. "Hey buddy can I cut?" He starts floating and casting lighting from his fingertips. "You dare?" I correct him "I'm 76. I'm 76 Percy Percent" He floats down. "Oh my name is He. How are you doing. Dare tries cutting in line. He has a power. He can cut in lines and not be hated as much and also legally he can do that, so it's like you really want to fight something like that in the courts? really? fight this guy with a legal precedent to skip lines? You know how much money you'd need to do it?

And even then will anyone convict him? he can sway the judge and courts with his influence. He and I attack Dare regardless of how dangerous this might be. Dare starts by grabbing his power and showing it to us. "it has the turbo!" he revs his power and he gains the ability to Dare someone. 

I triple dog Dare you to....uh um ah? He is shot in the head and dies. Dare is dead. He frowns. He goes on to give Dare a eulogy. He was a great man. Always Dared the world to do everything. "Well I dare him to come back to life." He looked at Dares corpse. "I dare him to come back to life." He started staring at him even harder. his arm grew because of how angry he was. "I TRIPLE DOG DARE YOU TO COME BACK TO LIFE!" Nothing happened. He started grabbing bits of brain matter and putting it back in dares head. he then grabs dares power and writes on it. "forever immortal, in constant pain. also has severe ibs and is allergic to gluten. 

Dare comes back to life. "woah I'm back." he grabs a gun and kills himself but it doesn't work. he looks at his power. "awww, why'd you mess with it?" he starts scribbing out the bits He added. I use my power 75 percent! I make his fingers 75 percent what they used to be. Dare checks his hands out. "wicked." I use it again. "woah they're all boney" I use it again "Hey man I get it My fingers are a little ugly." I use it again "AH!" "STOP!" "WHy are they GREEN?" 

I keep using it on him until he's just a lobster. Now I'll use it on the concept of eating. Drunch has been created. "lets go get some drunch!" He said. I check my pager. I see my pager. I grab it. I grasp it. I squeeze it. Then I forget I don't know how to read. Then I remember I don't know how to read. Uh "go to the evil 8 headquarters....Jackie Earnie is there and killing all of us?" I smash my pager. Now We have a chance. I Grab Dares power and write "can teleport anywhere." I drop it and it falls into the sewer. 

Damn. I just use my power to teleport to the evil 8's headquarters to see Jackie Earnie is fighting people. I try to punch Jackie Earnie but he does a triple front flip, stops midair before he finishes and does a quadruple backflip. He punches me. "What the fuck He!?" I say to He. Jackie Sees he chance and throws some sand at me. Then I look at each sand particle and see that there are mini bright pink q's on them.

"Dr. Q. Cumber betrayed us." Dr. Q. Cumber materialized out of nothing. "You called?" Dr. asked. "No I said I stated a fact." Dr. then vanished. "Get back here!" Dr. rematerialized. "What?" Dr. asked. "Why did you betray the evil eight?" I asked. He frowns. "Betray is such a strong word." The letters in the sentence he just said started beating the shit out of him. "AHH" stop stop hitting me!" "You're strong I won't mess with you!" Betray kept wailing on him. It was difficult to watch. 

"Please I won't think of you as weak ever again." He started crying Dr. Q cumber was in really bad shape. "I have I have to go." Dr. Q Cumber ran away never to be heard from in the next 10 seconds. 10 seconds later he came back. He held a pickle in his hand. "Free pickle!" "No catch!" He grabbed an even bigger bowl of pickles and was placing...something on them. The evil eight stopped fighting for a second to all run over to get these free pickles. All of us dug in and as soon as we did.

Dr. Q. Cumber got in the Q cumber mecha. As we lay dying he smashed us and killed us and other indescribable acts to gory for me to write out. so just imagine something evil. Jackie Earnie was just standing there. He Detected something was wrong. He still just looked at us all dying. Cool Jackie Earnie our glorious leader was dead. then everyone else started dying I died. 

Jackie Earnie stands there again. Everyone laughs and is enjoying themselves. Wow we sure defeated them. Thanks Dr. Q Cumber. Who will not in any way betray us again. 

Dr. Q cumber smiled and had his fingers crossed. "I have plans." "Big Plans." Al started heckling him. "About Yay high?" About Yay long?" Yay in tensile strength?" Yay in color? Yay in automotive ability?" Al went on for about 6 hours. After Al was well adjusted on Went on for about 6 hours he continued his questioning. 

This went on for 6 hours.