A Series of Unfortunate Events: Vol. 2

The Austere Academy [2]

Carmalita continued showing the Baudelaries around the academy "I don't know what that building is. I never go in there,"

"It says, 'library'," Violet said.

"Only a cake-sniffer would notice something like that,"

"It's very clearly designated," Klaus pointed out.

The librarian came out of the room "Oh! Hello." she greeted the Baudelaires "You must be the new students I've heard so much about. The Baudelaires, right?"

Carmelita moved in between the Baudelaires and the Librarian "You shouldn't talk to the library lady, because she smells funny,"

"Carmelita, always a pleasure,"

Carmelita began to walk off.

"A library is an island in a vast sea of ignorance," Klaus said.

"Particularly if that library is tall and the surrounding area has been flooded," The Librarian said.

"Let's go!" Carmelita told the Baudelaires.

"Well..." The librarian balanced the book she was holding on top of her head "come visit,"

The Baudelaires smiled at the prospect of having at least one friendly face in the academy as they followed Carmelita back to where they had been originally.

"Here's Vice Principal Nero's office," Carmelita proclaimed. "Where you were supposed to be ten minutes ago. You're late. Ahem,"

"Ahem?" Violet asked confused.

"Ahem,"

"Thank you?" Klaus replied.

"Thank you's not enough. It is traditional to give a special tour guide a tip at the end,"

"A tip?" Violet questioned.

"Yes, a tip! Are you deaf and blind, cake-sniffer?" Carmelita kicked the Vice Principal's door.

"Who dares to interrupt a genius when he's rehearsing?" The Vice Principal demanded.

"It's the Baudelaires. They're late for their appointment,"

"How dare you be late! Thank you, Carmelita, for telling me. Oh, that's a nice broach, by the way,"

"The original owner really liked it," Carmelita drawled.

"Oh,"

Carmelita spun off.

"What a lovely girl." The Vice Principal marveled "Sweet as a butterscotch buttercup. She has two living parents." He went back into his office "Well, come in. I don't have all afternoon,"

"How do you do?" Violet asked to fill the awkward silence.

The Vice Principal began to play his violin.

Sunny covered her ears at the horrid noise.

The Vice Principal turned once the room was once again silent "When you hear an incredible performance, it's tradition to clap and cheer and yell 'Bravo'!"

Klaus began clapping. "Yay!"

"Mmm, bravo," Violet added.

"Thank you." The Vice-Principal said "Thank you very much. And welcome, new students. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. My name is Vice Principal Nero, and my second-highest concern is that you uphold the strict standards here at Prufrock,"

"What's your first-highest concern?" Klaus wondered.

"My career as a violinist. I know all about you. You've been to guardian after guardian, and adversity has always followed. Adversity means 'trouble', by the way,"