HYSTERIA

TWENTY SIX - HEAD GAMES

HEAD GAMES - FOREIGNER

"These daydreams, what do they mean? They keep haunting me, are they warning me?"

ARIEL CALLAWAY

We got home from the trip on Sunday and I laid in bed all day. I slept through the pain even though my dreams consisted of twisted nightmares from my past. Every time I would drift off, my mind would go to a scary place and I'd wake up in a sweat, but since I was so exhausted and mentally drained, I would end up falling back asleep. It was a never ending cycle.

On Monday I was scheduled to work, but I don't remember how I got to work or anything that occurred once I opened. I was so out of it, Bonnie sent me home. I felt awful to say the least, but she could tell something was wrong and that until I feel better and don't let it affect my work ability, I am to stay home.

I laid curled up in my bed the rest of Monday before repeating the same routine yesterday, on Tuesday. I left my bedroom once, to go pee and to grab a half eaten roll of crackers just to get something in my stomach, even though I've had no appetite for days at this point.

I was surprised when Arlo came knocking on my bedroom door, June had called him to check in on me. We laid in my bed and watched Friends before he ordered Chinese takeout for dinner. He didn't even question it, immediately bringing the food back to my bed where we ate.

He washed the small stack of dishes we created and even washed a few of my blankets for me. I knew at this point my room was becoming a bit stale, but I didn't have the motivation, or energy, to do anything about it.

I tried not to sleep as much yesterday, having my TV on for a distraction because each time I drifted off the hallucinations got more detailed and twisted, which just had me waking up feeling worse than I did before. Whenever I did fall asleep, Arlo was right there next to me to hold me once I woke up.

Today I pulled myself out of bed long enough to shower, but the hot water and steam ended up pulling me into a trance and I was standing in there much longer than I thought. A knock on the door snapped me out of it and as soon as I heard June's voice it eased my nerves.

"Just me, hun. How are you feeling? I am proud of you for showering. Wanna go out and get some lunch? We can see if Andy is free."

Andy didn't hesitate to end things with Ben after last weekend. Turns out he'd been acting weird just days after they made it official. Ben didn't fight her on it, but he looked pretty fired up. At least that's what I've been told. I don't remember much from Saturday night after all of that happened, it's all pretty foggy.

We spent the majority of Sunday cuddled up in bed next to each other, but she has Niall and she took advantage of having someone to comfort her. I can't do much comforting when I need all of it myself.

"Yeah, lunch would be good." I answer, "No plans with Niall today?" My question comes out a little harsher than I anticipated, but she doesn't take it the wrong way.

"He might come over later." She clears her throat, "I'll text Andy, maybe Drew too if you're okay with it? Anywhere specific you wanna go for lunch?"

"Don't really care, you can pick." I tip my head back into the water, rinsing out any remaining product before turning the nozzle until the water is off.

I reach my arm out of the shower enough to grab my towel resting on the wall hook, quickly drying myself off before wrapping it around my torso and stepping out of the wet tub.

June is still standing in the bathroom, arms crossed as she leans against the countertop. "Are you sure you're okay? We don't have to go out."

I give her a reassuring nod, "I'll be okay. I want to." A sense of normalcy will be good. I can't mope around forever.