Stepping into the light

Safe in my arms

I think there is nothing better in the world then a Larry hug, enjoy
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I break out into the sunlight , forgetting were I am and who I am , as suddenly I am instantly bombarded with flashes from cameras going off, People yelling questions and accusations at me from every direction, I am getting crush in a swarm of people, being pushed and pull moving with the crowd like waves in a ocean.
I apply all my strength and I keep on pushing until I come out at the edge of the crowd and then I run.
I run like I am being chased by a wild animal, I run like I am trying to run from danger, I run  to escape from the chaos, I run to try and forget.
Images abuse my mind, Images of Lou laying helpless in the dark , images of a filthy creature touching him, I can't get the words he spoke  out of my mind, they are playing like a record on repeat.
I run and run, I push myself to keep on going , I don't care that my legs are starting to burn or my lungs feel like they are on fire.
I don't know how far I have ran, I don't recognise anything around me as I slowly come to a stop in a park under a tree.
I brace my hands on the trunk and lean over trying to catch a breath into my lungs.
I slowly slide down the side of the tree onto the damp grass, I can see the sun is starting to set , I reach into my back pocket for my phone, feeling around only to find nothing, I don't know were I am or how far I have come, or how long I have been away.
I slowly get up and decided to start walking in the same direction I came , my body is on fire, but I don't care that I am suffering, I keep thinking of what Lou suffered at the hands of those men.
Oh My God Lou, what must he be thinking, He will think That I don't want him anymore, he will think That I have rejected him, the air around me has cool off and darkness has set in.
I see car lights coming towards me slowing down to a stop, I finally noticed it's a police car.
" Mr Styles" a voice calls out to me.
" Yes".
" Well haven't you caused quite the commotion, we have been asked to look out for you from Detective Riley, hop in and I will give you a lift back to the hospital".
I Slide into the hard plastic like seat, and my sensors are hit with smells all around me it's smells like Coffee, fast food and body odour.
" How lone have I been gone?".
" Five hours, there was a APB put out to all squad cars to be on the look out for you, there are a lot of worried people out there , Your photo is plastered over ever news station, you sure must be someone important".
" You could say that".
" So what do you do?".
" Well I'm kind of a singer".
" Hang on , you are not Harry styles, The Harry styles the rock star" The officer said his eyes lighting up with Recognition.
" Yep that would be me".
"Oh my god, your my daughters favourite, wait till I tell her this , she is not going to believe me , I am sitting in the car with Harry fucking Styles, your songs are all I hear, they are played on repeat in my house"
We continue on talking as we finish the drive as we pull up outside the hospital there is chaos, the crowd of TV reporters and photographer has doubled in size, the police car slowly tries to push through crowd, the light are flashing , but the crowd isn't moving as we can't go any further.
" I am sorry about this Mr Styles, we have security coming to get you from the car into the building"
A line of security starts to form from the entrance of the hospital to the car, as the door opens and I get out I hear Questions being fired at me .
" Harry Harry look over here".
" Harry is it true you are going to marry Olivia wild".
" Is it true you left Louis".
" Harry is it true you and Louis broke up".
And they just keep coming , absolutely bullshit being yelled out , I chose to ignore it all questions like that don't need any more attention.
I am finally inside the hospital and racing down the corridor to find Lou, as I turn the corner I can hear Lou yelling " he has left me, he doesn't want me anymore , my life is over".
The anguish he is suffering breaks my heart I should have never left , I run into the room to find it full, everyone turns to me in a instant.
" Harry Edward Styles" my mum yells , " I don't know if I should hug you or hit you" she saids coming up in front of me , she pulls me into her arms hugging me tight , "You need to go to him" She whispers
I walk over to the bed with hesitation " baby" I say .
Lou turns and looks at me and started yelling " you left me, you said you would never leave me" As he breaks into sobs.
" You think I am disgusting and damaged now because that man touched me" he yells.
Around the room I hear gasps coming from everyone, they haven't been told that bit of information yet by their reactions .
My mum is by Lou's side instantly " oh honey" she said pulling Lou into her arms, with Lottie joining her.
As I Look around the room I can see tears forming in everyone's eyes, at the anguish that Louis is suffering.
" He doesn't want me anymore, I'm disgusting, I am so disgusting " he yells as he brings his hands up using his nails to claw at his skin.
" I need to get it of, I need to get it off" he keeps saying repeatedly.
" What sweetheart?" mum asks him pulling back.
I take a step closer " Lou" I say again
He doesn't seem to hear me as I move closer he seems to be in some sort of trance.
" My skin were he touched me , I need to get it off" he said pulling at the skin again on his arms.
I climb onto the bed and get behind Lou grabbing hold of his wrist pulling him back against me.
" Ssshhh, baby , it's ok I am here , I won't let anyone touch you again".
He is struggling in my arms but I hold him tight, I see everyone in the room slowing making there way out , giving us the time to be alone .
" Baby , it's ok I am here , You are in my arms safe" He finally stops struggling and goes limp in my arms
" Haz" He said unsure.
" Yes baby it's me, I've got you".
" You left me" he said " you left me" he keep repeating again.
" I'm so sorry baby, I will never leave you again".
" But you don't want me anymore".
" Of course I do, you are the love of my life, there is no us without you" I gather him to me more tightly.
" I'm so sorry, I just had to get out and some fresh air, then I started running and I couldn't stop, I had so much anger inside me , I had to get it out, I would have loved to have smashed the face of the man that touched you, I am so sorry, I got loss in my anger".
" Haz"
" Yes baby?".
" Kiss me, make it go away".
I gently place a kiss onto his lips, then another , we cling to each other like we are drowning without a life boat.
Exhaustion slowly over takes over our bodies as we fall asleep in each other arms.
Over the next few days , we are sheltered inside the hospital walls, Jeff had to put out a press release saying that we were still together and asking for our privacy to be respected, things seem to settle down but there was still lots of speculation on social media about what exactly happened.
We have not received any more threat on mine or Lou's life, I would like  to think that it  is over but I have a feeling it's not .
At the moment Detective Riley is in our room talking about what the next step is in this crazy roller coaster of our life at the moment.
" Well Mr Styles that is totally up to you" Detective Riley said.
We have just been discussing were Lou and I am going to move to  they are trying to move us to a safe house but my argument to that is  that we were found in the cabin when no  one was meant to know, so I am arguing that we will live in our house and just get extra security.
After lots of conversations we are finally allowed to leave, we decided to stay in the hospital and leave in the early hours of the morning as no one would be expected that.
It's 1am in the morning , we head  out to a waiting car with a police escort.
With extra security and a new state of the art security System we feel comfortable to go home, I have a surprise waiting for Lou when we arrive.
Home , I can't wait to get inside and just sit on our couch, and cook in our kitchen, and sleep in our own bed.
As we open the door We both let out a sigh of contentment, I pull Lou into my arms.
" We are home baby".
Next we see coming towards us a black ball of fur.
" Clifford" Lou yells dropping to his knees as Clifford excitingly jumps, licks  and rolls all over Lou.
" Thank you Haz" Lou said looking up towards me with tears in his eyes.
" Oh Cliff, I have missed you so much" Lou said snuggling into his fur .
I walk away and let them enjoy there happy little reunion.
" Love I am going to make us some tea, then we will head up to bed" I call back to Lou,.
I go about making our tea, then take the tray up to the our bed room, waiting for Lou to come up, I here Clifford running up the stairs first then see Lou slowly following behind.
" Baby , are you ok?" I ask with concern in my voice realising that he just got out of hospital after serious injuries.
I am quickly by his side , wrapping my arm around him helping him up the rest of the stairs, I help him into more comfortable clothes before settling us in bed.
" Here baby"I say handing him his favourite cup of tea, we both enjoyed the comfort of being in our own bed with our things surrounding us.
I pull Lou into my arms and Clifford jumps on the end of the bed, snuggling down around our feet.
" Let's sleep baby, I love you".
" I love you more" I hear him say with sleep overcoming him.
I am startled awake with Clifford making little barking noises.
" What's up Cliff" I ask , his nose is nuzzling at Lou who I just noticing is breathing Erratic , he is moving on the bed and small whimpers are escaping from deep in his throat.
I put out my hand and touch him gently excepting this to comfort him, but in stead he starts screaming in pure terror, shrieks out loud.
" Don't touch me, get of me, no don't , please don't" .
I can tell Lou is reliving everything that happen when he was taken, Clifford is now full on barking at Lou, he is trying to help , suddenly Lou let's one more blood curdling scream that ricocheting of all the walls around us.
He sits up drenched in sweat and his body is trembling, I go to touch him but he yells.
" No get off me, don't touch me".
" Lou , Lou , it me Harry , you are safe with me" I say these words a few time until I notice that it is slowly sinking in.
" Haz" he whispers .
" Yes baby , it's me , you are safe" In the next Instant he launches himself at me hanging on tightly.
" I knew you would find me" he said through the tears.
" Yes Baby I would never give up looking never" .
I hold him quietly until the tears and shaking have subsided.
Clifford is by his side the entire time, giving him gentle licks and nuzzling his head into Lou's lap, I see one of Lou hands go out and run his finger through Clifford soft fur.
" Baby it's nearly morning, how about I run us a bath and we can enjoy a long soak, is that ok baby, is it something you feel comfortable doing".
I am still not sure How he will still react to me touching me yet.
" Yes I would like that".
I leave Lou and prepare the bath, pouring some of his favourite bubbles in.
" Come on baby" I lead Lou into the bathroom and gently help in him undress , I notice he flinched a few time when I get close to certain part of his body.
I step into the tub, and hold out my hand to Him , he slowly moves over to the side of the tub and places his hand in mine, he steps in and we both sink into the warmth of the water with foam floating around us .
I pull Lou back against me, settling him between my legs.
" You ok baby?".
" Yes Haz".
" The boys are coming over to spend the day, I hope that's ok".
" Yes Haz, I am looking forward to seeing them".