Birthday Planning

FAMILY DONT START WITH B

NOTES: This chapter will have a trigger warning for panic attacks and I have selective mutism and I felt like Buck with his trauma would also partly have selective mutism with his self-blame. I feel like his coping mechanism would also be internalized. I apologize in advance if that is not something you can handle. I've only seen it with a few fandoms, most commonly Dean Winchester. Also my therapist said it was a good idea. Like I'm not even joking I told my therapist about this and she told me to put as much in as I wanted. It was healthy, she said. We will see

Bucks P.O.V

Hi. dad. Was all that escaped my throat. As I felt my phone fall out of his hand.

Hearing his voice was something that haunted my dreams on bad days and the voice that made me aware of my surroundings in large crowds. As I sat there in the restaurant frozen. My eyes filled with tears. I couldn't speak. needed some water. Or 6 more beers. had not decided yet. As I looked at Eddie across the table, Eddie tried to find Allison to get the check so we could leave. Ana is sitting there staring at me and then looking at Eddie. To see if this happens a lot or something. She looked around their table as the people started to stare at this 6-foot man having a panic attack in the middle of a busy restaurant. I just wanted to scream but my voice was in the depths of my stomach. As I watch the rest of the world fast-forwarding. And I'm stuck in a silent movie. I can see Chris trying to talk to me but it was like I was trapped. I couldn't speak. Flashes from the truck bombing hit him again. Flashes. I needed to get grounded before I started floating away. Breathing became harder and harder. Everything was getting blurry. I felt like I was stuck in mud slowly sinking. Water is water. As the world around me kept going like normal, of course, no one would care if I was to just sink into the earth. I'm still sitting in this restaurant, right? Why do I feel like I'm moving? I don't remember getting up. Someone is holding me. It feels warm and smells like lavender. It had to be Eddie. He looks around and now there are street lights. No, they are leaving me again.

Eddies POV

Eddie watched as the phone fell from Buck's hand. Eyes watering. He needed to find Allison for the check. Eddie grabbed Buck's hand but he couldn't feel it. Chris tries talking to him. I'll be back. Ana, can you come with me? As Eddie searched the restaurant for the waitress he was running out of time. Buck was already grabbing his throat; he was running out of air. As he turned to keep looking Ana interrupted him to ask " what the hell is wrong with him we are in public he's embarrassing us, Edmundo." As he locks eyes with Allison he hurries to the other side of the restaurant where she was serving a table. Ana right now isn't the time to be rude. I need to pay for this. And get Buck out of here, Eddie said not in the mood for this conversation

''Allison here this should cover our bill we need to leave. " Eddie said out of breath

Thank you, Eddie, is everything alright? Allison asked worriedly

Yes, Ali Buck is having a panic attack. Eddie said quickly.

Omg is he okay, can I do anything? I'll go get some water. Allison hurried to the kitchen and straight to the table.

At the table, Eddie was trying to get his attention back. Buck, Evan. look at me it's gonna be okay I got you. Grabbing the water from Allison Buck you need to drink this. Can you sip this, please?

Allison suggested taking Buck outside.

Yeah, we are going outside. Evan we are leaving can you hear me. Eddie looked into Buck's eyes and they were pure water. As he lifted him from the chair. They walked outside and decided to just go home.