It Starts Here / 𝗯𝘅𝗯 (✓)

4: Birthdays and baking

CHAPTER FOUR
Eleven years old

Felix turns eleven on a Wednesday and it's the worst day of his life.

Reason number one: Felix wakes up and it's raining. A lot. Ten-year-old Felix doesn't like when it's raining and at eleven he still doesn't like it. When it rains, he won't be playing soccer or climbing the tree in his backyard. He can play with dinosaurs inside and do puzzles and watch action movies he isn't old enough to watch, but he can also do this when it's not raining, so he doesn't count it as a good thing.

Reason number two: The first Wednesday his father has ever spent in his entire life at work, is the one Felix's birthday falls on. 

Successfully, Felix keeps himself from screaming when his father sits him down at the table and tells him this. He doesn't cry and ask him how it's even possible that his father is gone on a Wednesday when it's his birthday. Birthday!

If Felix has to say it himself, he does a pretty good job at keeping everything inside. He's proud of himself when his father apologizes and he's able to reply that it isn't his fault even though he has a hard time thinking that it isn't. Felix knows his dad wants it as little as Felix, but he can't help blaming him.

"I'm sorry, Felix," his father repeats, caressing Felix's shoulder. "I really am. Especially because it's the first one without—"

His father cuts himself off with an uncomfortable sigh—one that reminds Felix of a wounded animal—and Felix is happy that he does.

This is reason number three: It's his first birthday without his mother and Felix doesn't know how it'll go. Who'll bake the cake? The pancakes? Wrap the presents? Sing the songs? Light the candles? Tug him into bed at night, reminding him to wish for something before he falls asleep? Felix can't imagine his father doing any of it on his own. Especially not if he's busy at work.

The truth is: Wednesdays keep stabbing Felix in the back and he doesn't know how to feel about it.

And Felix feels so bad about the whole thing that he doesn't even tell Ares that it's his birthday.

It's when the teacher announces that they have a birthday kid in the class and everybody goes "oooooohh" that Ares looks around to find the lucky person. When Mr. Wen says that Felix does indeed look a year older than he did the last time he saw him, Ares turns his head and Felix thinks he looks betrayed. 

"It's your birthday?" Felix shrugs. When everybody starts to sing a birthday song for him, Ares continues, to which the teacher sends him a pointed look for. It doesn't seem like Ares notices. "Why didn't you tell me? You always tell me." 

Felix replies when the song is over and Mr. Wen is presenting the schedule for the day. "My dad. He's... working."

It explains nothing so Felix isn't surprised when Ares simply blinks. "When?"

"Today."

"But it's your birthday."

Felix shrugs as if it isn't a big deal. "It's fine. He'll come home tonight and then we'll watch a movie. Don't worry," Felix adds when Ares looks to be doing just that, "he promised me. Besides, I'm old enough to stay home on my own now. Eleven is a whole year more than ten."

Ares wrinkles his nose and opens his mouth as if he wants to argue with Felix, but Mr. Wen tells the birthday kid and his friend to be quiet so they can hear what he's saying. Ares is forced to turn his attention back to the teacher and that's it.