It Starts Here / 𝗯𝘅𝗯 (✓)

15: Mothers and children

CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Twenty-two years old

It's the day before they've agreed to go to the aquarium Felix discovered just outside the city, that Ares chooses to go through the growing pile of mail in the kitchen. 

"Rent," Ares says and throws the letter back onto the table, "always a delight to see."

Felix snorts from where he's comfortably sitting in the couch with his needles and yarn surrounding him in a mess, knitting. He says he's practicing so he can knit Cass a sweater for her birthday next year and Ares has just wished him good luck. "Sure does always put a smile on your face."

Ares fake-laughs and it just makes Felix real-laugh, barely glancing at Ares, but Ares is still looking at him so he clearly sees Felix frown at the yarn in his hands as he stops knitting, murmuring, "That can't be right."

Ares chuckles and busies himself with the next letter while Felix lifts his project up into the air as if it will help him see where he went wrong.

"Letter from school, letter from Mama—she loves writing letters these days... but I think this one is for Cass. She must've send it to the wrong address—oh. Lix, do we know a... Mrs. Katherine Wilson?" Ares realizes why the name sounds familiar, but definitely not familiar enough, just as the sound of Felix's needles hitting against each other stops. "Wait, isn't that—"

"Mom?" Felix grimaces and Ares doesn't know if it's because of the title he has yet to take from her or if it's because of how his voice managed to crack in the middle of the one-syllable word. 

Ares is looking at Felix, but Felix is staring at the envelope in his hand.

As Felix puts away all the yarn and the needles and unwraps himself from the blanket he looks all too frustrated with, Ares puts away every letter except the one Felix is interested in.

"But why would she—" Felix halts as if he suddenly forgot that he was speaking and stands in front of Ares. "Can I—"

Felix doesn't finish this sentence either, but instantly Ares nods even though he wishes he would give him permission to throw it in the trash. "Of course, Lix. It's yours. I doubt she's writing me."

The joke falls to the ground immediately and Ares doesn't blame Felix for barely noticing his attempt at making one. He hands him the letter and Felix just stares at it. The name of the person who sent it, Ares realizes and he wants to take it from him to spare him. 

"I—I'll just go and—Sorry." Felix doesn't spare Ares a glance and Ares doesn't get the chance to tell him not to apologize before he disappears into their bedroom, closing the door behind him. Ares doesn't follow him although it's itching in his body to do so. To make sure that Felix is okay. 

Instead, he pulls out a chair and he waits. 

"Are you ready to go?"

In the doorway, Felix stands the next day, dressed in one of Ares' favorite sweaters and keys clutched in between his fingers. The other hand, he is scratching his cheek with as he waits for Ares to react.

Blinking, Ares closes the fridge. Although he thinks he knows where this is going, he still asks, "Where are we going?"

Felix barely reacts. "The aquarium."

Hesitatingly, Ares says, "I didn't think—" he pauses. "Lix, we can go some other time. It's okay."

"I don't—" Felix averts his eyes and Ares almost moves to align with his gaze. "I just don't want to think about it right now. We had plans. I don't want them to be cancelled because of this." Ares thinks Felix can tell that he's about to continue—reassure him that Ares doesn't mind cancelling their plans because, of course, this is a lot—because quickly, Felix adds, "Please?"