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VIXX Leo - First and Last ( angst )

Leo's P.O.V

I walk into the lonely hallways of the castle, the home of my parents that passed away a long time ago and the place where I turned.

The walls were painted a bloody red. The pictures of past relatives hung on the walls neatly, giving a cold feeling.

I continue walking until I reach a pink door.

A small smile slowly appears on my lips.

I open the door and was greeted by her bright smile. Kyung Mi. The only girl who was able to melt the ice in my heart.

She was laying on her bed with an air mask on her mouth. The continuous beep of the machine was the only thing that assured me that she was alive and okay.....for now. She has cancer if you were wondering why she's like this.

"Hey, Leo." she said weakly. I walk up to her with a smile.

I hold her small hand that was getting colder and thinner by the day.

Her breaths were already becoming irregular. Her body hasn't been accepting the oxygen so the doctor gave me an oxygen mask.

I stroke her hair and she smiles. Seeing her smile warms up my heart even though I don't have one.

You must be wondering again. Sorry for making you confused.

I'm a vampire.

Yes. The monster from fairytales or movies. The one that feeds on blood to survive. The monster that is told to be cold-blooded and cruel.

I was like that before but I met Kyung Mi. She accepted me even though I was a monster. She loved me even though I killed so many for my own needs. For blood. She stayed with me. Trusting me even though I could kill her any second.

I thank her for everything but I can't do anything now. She is already dying in front of me.

You must be thinking 'You're a vampire! You can just bite her and she can turn into a vampire too. You can live your happily ever after.' But it's different.

Only pure bloods, vampires that were born as a vampire can do that. Have you seen Twilight? Well, they're wrong. People who are bitten and turned into a vampire can't turn someone else into a vampire.

I would've thought of turning her into a vampire to end her pain from the beginning.

I look at her frail body. Her arms and legs are as thin as sticks. She is so skinny that her cheeks were sucked in. Her eyes looked like they were popping out too.

She just looked helpless. There was no cure. Nothing to help her. There is just the suffocating wait for the time she will leave.

I hug her tightly and she weakly pats my back.

"J-Jagi. I'm tired. C-can I sleep?" Her voice was weak and it sounded like she was trying so hard to even make a sound. Her whole body would flinch from every word she said. I shook my head violently.

"Don't go to sleep! Don't close your eyes! Please! Don't leave me!" I plead. Her eyes kept closing but she kept trying to open them. I know that she would want to sleep but what would happen if she didn't wake up after her eyes closed?

I know I'm a man and a vampire to add on but who wouldn't you be scared of losing the one person who was there when you needed someone to lean on the most?

I don't want to lose her, but look what's going to happen. She's dying! And I can't do anything about it!

I can't help but blame myself for being so useless.

I was losing my temper until I felt her cold hands, almost as cold as mine now, touch my arm gently.

"C-calm down. D-don't worry. I-I p-promise to wake up." Her body flinches in pain from every word again. I just nod and she falls asleep.

I hold her hand and put it to my forehead. Her cold, skinny hands still calmed me. I loved her touch. It gave me a calming feeling.

Loving her without any reason is what real love is. She doesn't have to be beautiful or anything. Just loving her without an absolute reason. That is how much I love her. No words can explain it. I will always love her. Even if she leaves me.

I lay down next to her and hug her tightly, not wanting to let go. I stay awake since I can't even sleep but I close my eyes to calm myself.

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My eyes open when I feel Kyung Mi's body move.

I look to see her hand on my cheek and her eyes looking at me. Her eyes gave me a warm and loving look.

I sent her a smile and I place my hand on top of hers. We gaze at each other's eyes. It felt like seconds but it was actually hours until a blank stare replaced the once warm eyes.

The long beep was heard and I called for the doctors.

They entered and told me to exit. I watched through the window.

My tears start to fall from my cheeks. This was the first time I cried since I turned into a vampire.

I bang my hand on the glass but not too hard so I don't break it. I hit my head to the window and close my eyes tightly.

Why am I so useless?! This shouldn't be happening! I don't want to lose her! Why does she have to die? Why does she have to have cancer? Why do I have to go through all this?! Why is this all happening to me?!

I start to sob.

I shouldn't be like this. I should be happy I got to meet her......

But why do I have to go through this much pain?

I hate this. Watching the person you love die in front of you and you can't do anything to help her.

I can't help but think now. Which would hurt more? Being the one to have cancer or having to watch the person you love die. Which is worse?

Both are suffocating. Both cause an eternal pain,and there's no cure. The constant clutching of the chest that feels like a spear went through it. To sum everything up, both hurts and there is not much comparison between them in which is more painful.

I run back to the door and wait for the doctors to come out. Hours past until a single doctor came out.

He sent me a look of pity. I just stare with a blank face, not knowing how to react.

My body went numb all over. My eyes turn red and my fangs start to sharpen from anger and depression. The doctor pats my shoulder in comfort. I don't move until he left completely.

I take my first step but each step felt so heavy. Like I was carrying something so heavy that my feet are already sinking into the ground.

I finally reach her bed. A white blanket was covering her body. There was no sign of her breathing or moving. She's dead.

I put my hand under the blanket and get her hand. I look at her once warm and comforting hands that would help me calm down when I get angry or frustrated. Now, her hands were so skinny and cold. There was no color anymore and it was so bony.

A tear escapes my eyes and trickles down my face and lands on her hand. I hold her hand tighter and put it to my forehead.

I cry and cry. Sobbing over my first and last love.

Nothing can save me from this unending hole of darkness. You can't find a way to go back to the surface. Instead, you just fall into complete darkness and numbness.

How am I supposed to live the rest of my dead life? Knowing that I'm a vampire and immortal, it frustrates me because I can't join her in the heavens. I'm stuck here on Earth, waiting for someone to end my life for me.

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-12EXO7BTS