Queen Of The Tide

Food wars

Tw - Eating disorder.

"When's your birthday?" I ask Lucas as we walk around the hallways.

"Next month. October 21st."

We're playing 21 questions. To get to know each other better. Since, it's only been two days since we met and I already feel...attached.

"Isn't Esmeray's birthday 21st September?"

He hums in response.

They're the perfect duo. Both reckless, both hot, both really nice when you get to know them.

"My turn, right? Do you have any hobbies?" He asks.

"I draw some stupid stuff from time to time."

"Can you show me some?"

I smile at him.

No one has ever asked to see my art before.

"Yeah. Sure."

I look down at my nails, the blue tint has returned. I should probably eat something. But it still feels weird to.

I have this constant feeling inside me that the minute I pick up something to eat, Damon is going to come out of nowhere and tell me to put that shit down because I am already an embarasment of a girlfriend for him and stomach rolls aren't gonna help.

"I love your freckles," He blurts out, leaning forward against a table.

The table is kept close to a huge window, the sunlight creeps in and the shadows of the intricate design falls on his face. His eyes shine like moonlight when he smiles.

"Thank you. I- uh.. I used to cover them up. Still do. Forgot to, today."

"Well, I think they're really pretty. I mean, everything about you is pretty."

Is he... flirting? With me? Is this how flirting works?

No I am sure he's just being nice. Why would he flirt with me?

"You too."

"You think I am pretty?" He questions, smirking.

"Uh.. no- I mean-" I stutter out, unable to find the words.

Damn his face and his hair and his eyes and-

"So you don't think I am pretty?" He frowns, pouting out his lower lip.

I blink for a few minutes before bursting out with laughter and for some reason, throw my arms around his shoulders.

His perfume smells so good.

It's called Ocean Breeze. How cool is that?

Wait.

What is wrong with me?

"S- sorry. I don't know what... I'm sorry." I pull away.

"It's okay... More than okay," He smiles without asking why I reacted like this.

I want to hug him again. I won't. But if he does, I'll happily let him.

"Wanna go grab lunch?" He asks after a few seconds of comfortable silence.

"What's for lunch?"

"Whatever the hell you want."

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰

"Well, this is... quite a spread," I look over all the food on the table.

"Welcome to the royal family of Queloband . We all have one thing in common. Dramatic and extra. Well, that's two things. If it was up to me then I'd probably donate half this food and not...throw it away."

My eyes widen at that. One meal from the palace is equal to months of ration for so many people back in my old town. They'd kill for this food and warm water and a comfortable bed. Things that I have, at the moment.

"I tried to, you know. Convince the king to give back a bit. Long time ago, I was fifteen. Guess what he did."

"What?"

"He fired this nice old lady who used to work for us. Her husband had cancer and her pregnant daughter had just divorced her abusive husband. Her husband died because they couldn't afford his treatment anymore. And the girl had to go back to her husband for financial stability. She died as well courtesy of her husband. Her mother couldn't take the shock and died too. Heart attack. Thankfully, Esmeray heard about it. And she had a full-on rage moment. She found out where the family stayed, got the guy in jail and started funding the girl's daughter's education and lifestyle."

Wow.

That's...I don't even know.

Why would anyone ever want to speak up in a world where the speaking leads to an even worse fate?

"This keeps me awake. Sometimes. I can't believe that I let a whole bloodline die because of my silly rebellious phase."

"I understand why you may think this is your fault. But this," I motions towards the palace, "Isn't all this a bit much for a fifteen year old child? I see- I hear the things Esmeray and you went through. And I don't think any parent in their right mind would force their child to go through all of that."

I don't realise how close he has gotten until he sighs and his warm breath falls on my face.

"You're right. But that guy is not a parent. He's just a monster who was wrongly blessed with children."

I liked my father. He was an artist. He painted the most delicate and beautiful pictures of water and clouds. And me. He used to say I was just as calm and strong and beautiful like his paintings. I remember when I used to hold his hand, I thought how does a person that makes such soft strokes with a paintbrush have such rough hands. I get it now.

I paint when I am sad. But my paintings are always happy.

Art can be a way to channel your feelings, yes. But it can also be a way to cope.

"Enough of sob stories. Are you ready to eat?"

Eat.

That's going to be hard. Really hard.

"Since, we are...uh...admitting things, I have something to tell you."

"What, do you have gingivitis or something?"

I laugh a bit before opening up to an almost stranger about yet another part of me, "I have trouble eating. And, no, not because of gum disease, but because of Damon. And my own silly insecurities."

He frowns and turns to face me, still sitting on the chair beside me. His knees brush against mine and that makes it a little hard to focus.

"Go on." He says, reassuringly.

"While I was living with Damon, he definitely made eating seem like a crime, but it also felt like the only thing I could control. And that was what I did. I didn't eat when days were bad and felt overwhelming. Instead of doing other things to cope, I did this. I have never used a blade or pills but eating is so freaking hard. And I know it sounds so stupid but-"

I don't realise that I've started crying until Lucas engulfs me in his arms whispering about how it's gonna be okay and that this is a safe place and he relates.

Ironic because we are surrounded by weapons all the time. He himself is a trained killer yet somehow I feel safer than I ever have.

He tells me how beautiful I am and how Esmeray goes through the same thing. That's a surprise to me. Esmeray. That goddess of a woman thinks the same way J do.

That's some consolation.

Right?