Final Masquerade (THG fanfiction)

Chapter 5

Haymitch was already waiting in the train, looking out of the window. When we entered, he gave Cato a questioningly look which he answered with a nod. How nice, they had secrets again.

I decided to ask them, because one question couldn't hurt, right?

"What are you two planning? Why am I not involved in that plan? Why do people always have secrets that I'm not allowed to know about?" Maybe I sounded a bit harsh. And to be honest: maybe I didn't want to know the answers but now it was too late. My mouth was always faster than my brain could think and this was really a bad habit.

Haymitch just seemed amused. "You'll see, sweetheart. Sometimes it's better to not involve you because who knows how you would react?"

I lowered my head and looked at my glittering nails. Again he spoke in riddles. My reaction to what? A look to Haymitch confirmed my supposition that I probably had to wait, until I get an answer.

"'Kay," I mumbled. At least I get to know it later. Better than never.

Slightly angry I left the entrance part of the train and went to my room that was luckily the same as four weeks ago. When I sat on my soft bed, all the memories were floating back. The fear I had felt, the hate towards the capitol, the will to survive. All these feelings never disappeared.

I was still scared. Nobody knew how the districts would react to our berry scene. Nobody knew what President Snow would do to make us pay for being two victors this year.

I still hated the capitol. Who didn't - except the capitol people? They were the most disgusting people I knew. They loved to watch children getting slaughtered; they bet who would be victor, they watched these horrible games every single year and celebrated it like Christmas. I hated them all so much. They lived the perfect life and we lived in the fear of going into the Games or starving to death. If they only knew who it felt to be poor... The only one from the capitol I might actually like is Effie.

And of course I still had the will to survive. I didn't kill these children in the arena to die now. I didn't survive this to get killed by the capitol. After all I had someone at home who needed me as much as I needed her. I had been ready to die for her but I always knew that I had to come back. Prim and my mother alone wasn't a good combination because neither of them could hunt. And even if Gale helped them, even if they had enough food, Prim would still be like alone because I don't think that my mother would be able with another person she loved dying. Now that I was a victor, their life should be easier. We had money now and we had a bigger house. My mother would be able to buy the medicine she needed for her job. We would never starve again.

I was really excited to finally go home. I missed Prim so much. She was my everything. Even in this cruel world where we had starved everyday she could make me smile with just being her. Hopefully she didn't lose this lovely skill because of me having been in the Games. She had lived in fear knowing that I could have died. Maybe she wasn't that happy little girl anymore. Ever since Effie had called Prim's name at the day of the reaping I had thought about how this affected her. She should be growing up that fast just because of the Games. After all she still was my little duck.

There was another person I wanted to see again. Gale. But I don't know if he wants to see me. I hoped our relationship hadn't changed because of me being a victor now. We could still go hunting - even if we got so much money now that we could give also his family enough to live - and be best friends like we used to be. I would never feel better than him just because I won the Games.

I got taken back to reality by a loud knock at my door.

"Lunch is ready, Katniss."

Haymitch. I was actually surprised that he didn't break the door or didn't just come in like he usually did.