Maybe I just wanna be yours | Minsung

Let me be the portable heater

"Have you tried writing down how you feel into a poem? We used to do poetry club together, you must know something about poetry." Miya suggested, really not having time to consolidate Minho about his problems, especially since they were hardly ever close friends.

"that sounds shit" Minho rolled his eyes. He did enough writing for school, why should he have to do more? Plus, he hated poetry club, at least, he thought so.

"suit yourself. I really don't have time for this as I'm supposed to be marrying my girlfriend in a few hours so I'm going to leave you to it." She got up, not leaving any room for him to argue.

Although he wouldn't like to admit it, he began to write his poem. He had no intentions of ever showing it to Jisung, he didn't even think he could get close enough to the younger againto even do that.

The poem was imperfect and didn't rhyme, but he didn't care. This poem was a way to write down his emotions and maybe take a little bit of the weight off that he carried on his shoulders all the time.

After he had finished it, or at least given up on it, it was close to 9pm and the hallways were dark and bare, everyone in the comforts of their own home or dorms.

He screwed it up and shoved it in the bottom of his bag, out of sight out of mind.

"What are you doing to me Han Jisung?" Minho gritted his teeth with frustration, taking a deep breath as he strolled the dark halls to the outside where he could drive his way home.

As he lay in bed he read over the incomplete poem, staring hard at the ceiling to stop any emotion from spilling out occasionally as he did so.

"'let me be the portable heater'.. god what was I thinking, this is stupid..." he groaned, throwing the paper on his nightstand and burrying his face in his pillows, ready for sleep to take over so he didn't have to think anymore about it.

—

The next morning, Jisung was feeling uneasy. He hadn't told anyone about his and Hyunjin's little encounter, and wasn't planning on.

He wished to forget it even happened, but he can't deny that he liked it.

Jeongin was the one to steal him from his thoughts, reminding him that he would be late for his lecture if he didn't get ready.

Jisung fumbled to get his stuff together and brushed his teeth in a world record of 2 seconds, rushing out of the door and past Jeongin in a flash.

"bye then.." Jeongin shook his head as he locked the door behind them both.

They had gotten a dorm together again after Jisung had begged Jeongin, as if the younger had any one else to chose.

Felix was quite happy to share a dorm with Wooyoung, one of the boys from Jisung's old dance class, which only left Jeongin and Jisung as Hyunjin would be staying at his apartment.

As Jisung walked past Minho in the corridor, he had a sudden urge to just turn around and grab him. He pulled him all the way down to a random closet and closed the door behind them.

"what? what the fuck was that for?" Minho exclaimed, out of breath after having to keep up with Jisung.

"why do you hate me? what did I ever do to you.." if Jisung wanted anything out of this conversation, he wanted answers. He didn't want to have to overthink these things and wanted to at least put his mind as ease.

"I.. never liked you in the first place" Minho composed himself, holding onto his words as if holding on to the edge of a cliff.

"if that's true then..." Jisung let out a sigh, not ready for the answer the older is likely to give. "then just leave. Leave this room now and we never have to talk to eachother, again."

Closing his eyes, Jisung waited. He felt himself begin to shake slightly, a sense of discomfort forming in his tummy.

Minho walked to the door, placing his hand on the doorknob but never turning it, just remaining there with his hand still.

He dipped his head down, half ready to just go and have it over with but not ready to let go of Jisung.

He tried to convince himself that keeping his walls around him wasn't going to let him win in this situation, but he still told himself he didn't like the younger.

His mind was at a battle, but a battle can't end with a tie.

He opened the door, the light flooding into what was once a pitch black room so now Jisung could see the back of Minho's figure, ready to watch him leave.

"what are you waiting for? Just go.." and even if he didn't want to, he couldn't help but listen to Jisung.

Either the younger had an effect on him, made him feel like he would do anything the younger told him to, or he really did want to just end things. That's what he told himself anyway.

But he couldn't step further than a few feet out, not having time to turn and run right back to the younger as Jisung had already left.

Jisung paced down the halls, blinded by his own tears. He tried to cover his eyes enough with his hand to be able to see, but people could easily tell the boy was crying with the choked whimpers leaving his mouth.

He didn't know what he was thinking, he should've known Minho wouldn't have stayed.
He felt stupid for even thinking the older liked him after so long, and even stupider for chasing after him as if it hasn't been two whole years of heartbreak.

He let his legs carry him through the pouring rain, taking him wherever until he ended up outside Hyunjin's apartment complex.

—
A/N: oh no what's he gonna do 😔🤝