Becoming Kennedy

1- Pescetarian

"Alright before we begin we have a new student with us today. She moved here all the way from Boulder, Colorado! Would you like to introduce yourself?" The teacher looked at me expectantly.

This was my first day at Malibu High and I already felt out of my depth. Everyone here was stunning, had their own individual style, and drove the coolest cars. It was all so intimidating. I had no idea how I would ever fit in with any of these people. It's not that I'm not good looking, or dress horribly, or have a boring personality...I was just different.

Growing up in Colorado seems like an entirely different world from the fast paced life that LA required. I realized I was caught up in my thoughts for too long and everyone was staring at me.

We're off to a great start.

I stood up and put on my biggest, best fake smile, and put my hand on my hip. It was clear to me that to make any friends, being myself wouldn't do.

"Hiiii, I'm Kennedy Collins." I started, making sure to elongate my words and pay attention to diction. I think that's how Californians talk. "I'm a cancer, and I like long walks down Santa Monica pier. I'm a pescetarian and gluten free fish tacos are my life." I looked around the room to see people smirking and trying to stifle a laugh.

Okay, note to self: tone down the stereotypes. I decided to switch back to my normal voice; this didn't really seem to be working. "Okay....I moved here from Colorado about a week ago because of my Dad's job, and I'm still a little lost so if anyone wants to show me around that would be great." I sit down, feeling a little more comfortable. I'm a pretty confident person, so public speaking doesn't really throw me off, but seeing people want to laugh at me was making me a little more self conscious.

I sat through the rest of my classes until lunch, avoiding eye contact, and not really talking to anyone. Every class started the same way: with me having to introduce myself and give some "fun facts". After the train wreck that was my Californian impression during first period I decided it was best to be myself, or at least some variation of myself. I mentioned that I had a cat and a dog, or that my little brother was at the middle school next door, but I never got into my interests or anything below surface level. I still wasn't sure what was considered cool here. I wonder what kinds of lies I'll have to tell to even begin to fit in here.

Lunch eventually came, and this is the first time in the day that I actually felt terrified. Back at home, I was pretty popular. I had a big group of friends, had a coveted spot on the school ski team, and I even had a boyfriend here or there. But now I'm starting from scratch, and I don't know what I'm going to do. I was terrified alright, but I can't let anyone figure that out.

I stand in front of the doors to the cafeteria and take a deep breath. I lift my head up tall, roll my shoulders back and open the doors full force. I try my best to work up a strut, and without making eye contact with anyone, head straight for the food line. Once I make it in line I finally take a second to take in my surroundings. The caf was insane there are three lines filled with delicious looking food. The farthest line has sides like french fries, soups, single slices of pizza, cookies, almost any junk food you could think of. The next line seemed to have more main dishes and featured sushi, a couple different kinds of pasta, and what looked like roast chicken. The final line is the one I'm currently in and is by far the longest. From where I'm standing it looks like a pretty extensive salad bar (boring). I'm turning to get out of line when I'm stopped by a group of four girls.

The one directly in front of me, I recognize from my first period English class. She was about average height but she had on some crazy platform heels so she towered over me, and I'm pretty tall, so that's hard to do.

She had long, bleached blonde hair and her winged eyeliner was so perfect it looked like it was tattooed on. "Hiiii there" she says, obviously mocking my attempt to introduce myself this morning. "Hey" I reply trying to sound as normal as possible. "I'm Abigail, I'm in your English class? After your abysmal intro in class, you mentioned you wanted someone to show you around. So here I am, you can thank me later."

I don't really know what to say, I did ask for someone to show me around but Abigail doesn't really seem like someone I would particularly like. However beggars can't be choosers, and she seems to have a pretty decent group of friends with her, a bit of status couldn't hurt and this seemed like status to me.

"Yeah, about that, I'm a total idiot and I didn't mean to mock any of you or anything, honestly I really don't even know where that came from...." Before I could continue, Abigail interrupted me "Oh I thought it was hilarious honestly, I mean the whole Californian archetype is so absurd and totally fascist, I think its hella cool that you made fun of it! It's like a statement against society or whatever." I gave her a blank stare, "I'm sorry, fascist?" I tried hard not to laugh "Yeah, fascist. You know like totally wrong and not chill. Fascist."

"That's not really what fascist means, but I get what you're saying." Abigail's eyes switched from passive disinterest to a murderous glare. If looks could kill, I would be dead on the ground. "Oh really, Colorado? Then please educate me, what does fascist mean?" I don't know if I should respond or just sit with my foot in my mouth, but I figure I fucked up enough already so I don't really have much to lose. "Well fascism is a form of extreme nationalistic authoritarianism, it's a form of government that started in Italy during World War I, so for something to be fascist it would mean that it operated on the ideals of fascism, and the "Californian archetype" doesn't...therefore it's not really......fascist." I almost whisper the last word; there goes my first chance at friendship.

Abigail's eyes go blank and she doesn't say anything for what feels like hours. Finally she says "Wow Colorado, someone's a smarty pants aren't they? We need one of those around here. All of you guys are total dumbasses." She laughs at her own "joke" while there is only minor protest from the three girls behind her. I don't really know what to say so I sort of just smile? I guess I'm in the clear for now.

"So Colorado where do you think you're going?" Abigail asks. I guess we've moved on. "Umm well, I'm not super into salad so I was going to head over to the other lines and get some food." There was a collective gasp from the group.

"The other lines?" one of the girls asked. "You eat carbs?"

"And processed foods?"

"And refined sugars!?" each girl felt the need to tack an extra food onto the list.

"Ummmmm yes?" I reply, another gasp comes from all of them. "Also, my name is Kennedy if you don'..." I'm interrupted again, "Colorado, as my first act as one of your new best friends I'm going to have to prohibit you from leaving the line. Salad bar is almost always the way to go unless they're offering up sushi or some kind of steak. Which isn't even an option for you because didn't you say you were a pescetarian? Anyways, you are going to stay here with us and tell us all about yourself." She smiled and batted her incredibly thick, and most likely fake, eyelashes.

I'm silently kicking myself for the pescetarian comment, but I guess I don't eat meat now. I stay in the salad line and begin to reflect on my new "best friends". This probably won't be the best idea, but right now, it seems like my only option.