The Time Traveling Crime Fighters

Hitler's Wife

(Emma's Point of View)

It's been a few days since Hitler kidnapped me and he's just recently moved me from his upstairs cage to the basement cage. He says I'll have some "friends."

As I sat in that cage, the darkness engulfing me, I heard a voice.

"Emma!!! Hey!!! So you're here, too? Well, so are we!" it said. I swung around in alarm and saw who it was.

Out of the shadows stepped Ciara and Jacob, who were a couple of my friends. Why were they here?

"H-heeeyyyy... guys..." I stuttered, "Why are you here?"

"We were captured by Hitler, too," Ciara said.

"How?"

"Well, that's a long story. But I guess we have time.

"So there I was, right? Just minding my own business while I was walking through Walmart. All of a sudden, the green peppers exploded as I walked past them, and, laying in with the cantaloupes was Jacob here.

"I looked at him and said, 'Jake! Did you see that tomato back there? It looked exactly like Randy Jackson!'
And he was like 'Totally!!! How could you miss it?' And I said, 'So why are you in with the cantaloupes?' And he said, 'what I'd like to know is why the green peppers exploded and not the jalapeños.' And I said, 'Yes!! That would make so much more sense!'

"So I helped him out of the cantaloupes and we left the building. A while later, we found ourselves in a Taco Bell. So while we were in there, I was all like, 'You know who would like some tacos? TINA FEY!' And Jake was all like, 'Yeah. I wish she was here.'

"Then, all of a sudden, Sarah Palin walked in! I was in awe, but Jake was able to say, 'Well, it's not Tina Fey, but she looks similar enough.'

"So we bought Sarah Palin some tacos and we spent the afternoon with her! It's surprising how lemony a person can be. She's like the living embodiment of lemonyness.

"So after that, Jacob and I thought it would be fun to go for a walk through downtown Chicago. So we did! But then, Elvis Presley came out of nowhere and I was like, 'Wait! Aren't you dead?' And Elvis said, 'Sure I am, and so are you!' And I was like, 'No, silly, I'm not dead!' And Jacob was like, 'Look over there! It's Hitler!' So we decided to go see if he was a nice person. Needless to say, he wasn't. And here we are!!!"

"What?"

"Well, that's a long story. But I guess we have..."

"NO!!! You don't have to repeat yourself."

"Oh my Gertrude!!! She's coming!!!"

"Wait... what? Who?"

"Hitler's wife!"

Then the door opened and closed. And there were footsteps walking toward me. And out of the shadows stepped my friend, Abby.

"Abby!! It's so good to see you!!! How'd you end u-"

"Shut up, peasant!"

"Wha-"

"I SAID SHUT UP!!!"

"Abby, what wro-"

"FOR THE LAST TIME!!!! SHUT UP!!!!!! And don't call me Abby. It's Mrs. Hitler to you."