𝐪𝐮𝐨𝐭𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐨𝐤 ⁻ ᵐᵉ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵐʸ ᶠʳⁱᵉⁿᵈˢ

🌷

"it's not like im gonna run off with him to france just to find out hes shagging 3 french girls with a baguette as a condom" - 🌷

🌷 - "miss i finished"
english teacher - *starts reading it out loud*
🌷 - "ah. we're reading it out loud now. i see."

🌷 - "he's an abortionist"
me - "that says abolitionist"

me - "whats my most prized possession"
🌷 - *stomps on ground*
me - "what does that mean"
🌷 - "your teddy ellie"
me - "yes, but how is that ellie"
🌷 - "cuz el-e-phant"

me - *sends funny video of 🌷 to her boyfriend*
🌷 - "right. you can fondle my mum. you can fondle my nan. you can fondle anyone in my family. but you can't do that"

"I'm not against lesbians, I just don't wanna look like one" - 🌷

Bow - *rams her head to the bottom of the wall*
🌷 - *shoved a pillow against the wall* "don't go down there without protection, if you get what I mean" *winks*

(playing roblox)
🌷 - "whys the clock moving so quickly"
Bow - "cuz its not real"
🌷 - "yeh but why"
Bow - "cuz its a game"
🌷 - "but I don't. like. it."

"dyou know i thought benedict cumberpatch was an american president but turned out he was an actor n then i guessed he was in sherlock cuz he looked like it n then i searched it up n he was but not the sherlock i was thinking but still i guessd right. crazy how that can happen aint it" - 🌷

🌷 - "im needing to wait half an hour to do a covid test cuz i ate"
me - "you do realise theyre just the nose ones right?"
🌷 - "yeh but like the food will still be there"
me - "but you dont put your food up your nose"
🌷 - "yeh but.... oh."
me - "what on earth have you been doing with your food"
mads - "maybe she trys to eat it through her nostrils. wouldnt be suprised"
🌷 - "yous dont know like i could be one of them folk who need to put the tubes up their nose"
me - "but we do know that you are not one of them folk cuz we are with you everyday"
🌷 - "yeh okay fair enough ill give yous that one"

🌷 - "aghhhhhhhh"
🌷s dad - *looks at her*
🌷 - "sorry i just wanted attention"

"vaxter mashin" - 🌷
(she meant max verstappen)

question - "which American Nation did Germany invite to join the first World War"
me - "Canada"
🌷 - "France"

question - "what is the name of the fine powder made from this green plant"
me - "thia"
🌷 - "weed"

*english accent* "noooo its all a con. con your nan. CORN ON THE COB" - 🌷

🌷 - "can I quickly go dry my hair and then ring you back?"
me - "no"
🌷 - "okay byeeeeee love youuu"
me - "byeeeeee love youuu"

🌷 - "remember when I absolutely hated it when people spoke in cursive. like I absolutely despised it"
me - *in cursive* "yeah I remember. thats what made me love it even more"

🌷 - "oh my god I nearly just got killed by a high heal. I pulled down my makeup box and a heal fell and hut me on the head"
me - *australian accent* "I dont give a shit"
🌷 - "oh right okay. so if I died...."
me - *australian accent* "I wouldn't give a shit" *sings astronomy by conan gray in cursive*

🌷 - "Lucie I would hate to have you as a parent"
me - "why?"
🌷 - "dont get me wrong you'd make a great mum n all but "because I said so, because I said so, because I said so" your my friend but you say that more than my mother"
me - "what can I say, I like my own way"
🌷 - "clearly"

"I want to make so many your mum jokes right now. its like a drug. like *boy from our childhoods name*'s drugs. it genuinely feels like an addiction. I need to say it. I dont know how much longer I can keep up with this. I'm having withdrawals" - 🌷