Grew up in a rough neighborhood,
Wouldn't change it if I could.
I can't even say just one, we moved around a lot,
that's all I'd known since I was a tot.
Went nights without eating,
While you were getting those reserved dinner seatings,
bet those moments were fleeting,
but to me all I never saw was an end.
I was left to fend,
For myself,
By myself.
I've always been thuggin',
And I don't mean muggin',
not bangin' or slangin',
not shooting or looting.
I was having a war, though, internally.
Doubting myself, infernally.
Looking at you and the other kids with the newest cellular device,
I compared myself and it burned, like the red cayenne pepper spice.
Low on money,
but I still acted like everything was funny.
Washed my clothes in the sink,
while you just stained your favorite jacket made out of mink.
The more I kept changing schools,
the more I'd forget about the rules.
Failing in classes,
felt like the worksheets were drowning me in masses.
I was bullied,
which left my confidence even more sullied.
Boiled water to take a hot bath,
meanwhile something was boiling in me, a wrath.
Mommy and daddy were fighting,
and I played in the other room with my toys like it wasn't frightening.
Introduced to darkness at a young age,
wanted to lock myself away from it all in a cage.
Seeing all this, made me want to be a premature,
Instead I had to pre mature.
So, really, that all taught me how to be tough,
in fact, the streets taught me more than enough.
All that time alone,
not looking down at a phone,
gave me time to think,
and all the pieces began to link.
See, here are some basic rules of the slums,
just to add it all up, like sums.
Keep your eyes open and mouth closed,
in the face of anything you opposed,
keep yourself composed.
Be careful of fakes,
even in the green grass, there are always lurking snakes.
To get it on your own, you have to grind,
and that has never left my mind.
We tend to divide ourselves based on our classes,
but the ones on top are a bunch of asses!
While you look down on me from where I come,
I'm more open minded than you'll ever be and then some.
What real progress can you make by sitting idly?
And you like to mock me for hustling? Childly.
You sit all day long on that throne,
hovering over me like a drone,
but I know you just want to see the show,
of how the flower in the concrete would grow.
What I have accomplished was not given to me,
it came with a small fee,
struggling.
While it feels like you are doing an insane amount of juggling,
all it takes is hard work to create stability,
and that strengthens your agility.
I learned not to be ashamed,
because I did not choose this life, I cannot be blamed,
but if anything I am proud,
that through my experience I have learned that I can't keep my head in a cloud.
If I want to succeed,
I have to be as grounded as a seed.
I learned the beauty of dedication,
and that if we all had it, we would be a stronger nation.
So don't look at us like there's a difference,
That's what causes so much belligerence.
Don't look at us and look down,
that'll knock off your "highnesses" crown.
And stop putting stuff for us so high up on that shelf,
all we ask is that you look at us and see yourself.
Hanna Guzman (2020)
