Memories

Sally Jackson

"How many more of these do we think we have left?" Nico kicked the stump of an old oak tree and watched as the amber slip of leaves twirled to the ground beside his feet. He toed a small clump of grass away from his boots and wiped the fresh mud around the base of the tree.

"There can't be too many left now," Annabeth said. "Hopefully we'll escape all of this soon."

I couldn't agree more. It was weird to have somebody sift their way through your mind, chucking aside memories and sliding between thoughts as if they were pieces of trash, worthless for our current mission.

"Are there any other hidden secrets you've got left lying around?" Nico asked.

I scoffed, "Well if there are, I'm sure you're soon to find out."

"Where are we anyway?

"I'm not actually sure..." I trailed off. We were stood in the middle of a park. It was empty except for the glistening stream that slithered its way between two trees that stood at the summit of a hill adorned with a sea of blood-red spider lilies.

At the sight of those scarlet petals, a memory shot through my blood light a whip of darkness slicing at my chest. Of course, I recognised this place. How could I not? This hill, this field, was the first time I realised I wasn't like other kids... that I was different.

At the angelic chime of my name from behind me, I twirled around to face my mother who was herding a group of children across the playing field. It was a school trip and my mom had volunteered to help supervise; I must have been no older than kindergarten level.

For so long, this memory of mine had been placed on the backbench, irrelevant to who I now had become. Apparently, the gods really had it out for me.

"It's Sally." Annabeth blurted.

Amused, Nico smirked at Annabeth. "Great observational skills there, Athena."

Annabeth twitched her nose in annoyance but said nothing.

Nico continued, "Gods, she looks so young!"

He wasn't wrong. My mother's youthful face was void of any creases or lines; a vision of a young woman in love with life and freedom. Her rich chestnut hair tumbled over her shoulders in a rippling stream of curls, framing her blue eyes that gleamed with youth. Lips lined in a motherly grin; twenty-year-old Sally was unburdened as she watched her son with his friends.

My heart aches ached as if it were clamped in iron shackles and I tipped my head back to take a deep breath. Hoping to ease the ache, I pressed a scarred hand to my chest and attempted to massage away the pain.

"What is it Percy?" Nico said warily.

I sighed and dropped my hand to my side. "She's happy."

From Annabeth's gentle smile, I knew I didn't need to say anything more. Neither of my friends spoke either. Annabeth didn't reach for me.

Somehow, she knew that this pain, this burden that I had shoved down for so long, somehow went much deeper than any pain my stepfather or my bullies could inflict on me. No handholding or comfort or pity could help me here. My mother's pain was my burden alone to bear.

"You look adorable Percy!"

I grinned at Annabeth gratefully, welcoming her shift in conversation. "Do I not look adorable now?"

"You're insufferable now." She quirked an eyebrow up at me playfully.

"I'd rather be insufferable than impossible." I winked at her.

"And I'd rather not vomit." Nico scoffed; eyes wide. He slammed his sword into the ground before him so that it stuck out the ground like some bizarre offering.

It was easy this teasing: it was easy to ignore everything around them and fall into this comfortable friendship. Alas, I knew that we were here for a reason. I forced myself to face my mother and prepare myself for what was coming.

Unlike the previous memories we had been forced to witness, this memory did not elicit the physical pain I had become to accustomed with. No, this memory was the catalyst for a decade of agony in my life. It was this memory that had stained my youth and character.

All I had wanted in my life was to be a good kid.

Today was the beginning of my downfall.

"My love."

We watched as my beautiful mother knelt below her son, reaching out to scoop a midnight stray of hair out of younger Percy's eyes. Percy just stared up at his mother unabashedly, not yet suffering the embarrassment of being seen with your mother. Not that I had ever experienced such a shame- I had always been, and would always be, proud to be Sally Jackson's son.

"Remember what we talked about?" She smiled gently, peering into Percy's wide, mischievous eyes.

"Behave, be kind, be brave and—and...." Percy's cheeks puffed up in childish frustration as his mouth tried to sound out the final word of his mantra.

"Be free." The words tumbled out of my mouth in sync to my mother's lips forming the words. "I had completely forgotten about our mantra."

For years, before my becoming a demigod, my mother would have me repeat this mantra to remind myself of what I could be if only I dared. It seemed completely perverted now in light of everything. Be free. Be free- and yet I had wound up tied to the darkest soul in the universe. The irony of it was not lost on me.

"Well it worked." I turned to find Annabeth watching me, grey eyes alight with a swirling intensity. "You are kind and the bravest of them all. And you have granted the world its freedom ten times over."

Her words stirred something within me. Pride.

"So, it's just the 'behave' part that he needs to work on, then?" Nico's lips quirked up at the edges, unsuccessfully feigning innocence at the jibe. Annabeth elbowed him gently.

"Well," I said, "I'm sure we're just about to witness how well the 'behave' part goes."