Heaven - ONC 2022 LONGLISTED - old version

chapter 8: blow

Father Cal thought about the time he once saw a pair of doves fight. The birds had been pecking at each other and their once white feathers had turned scarlet. When one succumbed to its wounds, the other began to coo and circle it as though it had accomplished some grand victory.

Turning on the bathroom light, Cal saw himself in the mirror. He still looked the way he had for the past fifty years or so. Little changes were obvious, a strand of grey hair by his temples, a few thin wrinkles by the corners of his eyes. But no one would ever be able to guess his real age. No one had ever known anything about him since before man had landed on the moon. He was not content living a lie, but it was all he could do.

Caleb reached for the faucet and turned the shower on. Steam plumed from the cubicle. Heat extended towards him. As he removed his clothes, the mirror caught twin sword tattoos decorating both of his inner arms. Just below his belly button, in a spot no one had seen in decades, a vine of thorns was inked from hip bone to hip bone. Caleb ran a palm over his stomach as he looked down. All of his inkings had been done so long ago he barely remembered when and why. When he turned to enter the shower, two large scars screamed at the peeking mirror. The scars were on Cal's shoulder blades. They were red and angry. When Father Caleb reached up to touch them, he cried out and paused under the steamy stream of water. "Has my faith never been enough?" Tilting his head up to the water, he choked back a sob. "You welcome all into Your church yet cast every Kadisin away from Your Heaven." The water ran down Cal's skin. It slithered down the black inked tattoos and over the angry red wounds. "Tomorrow, we will sing in Your glory," he murmured, "has that ever been enough?" Shaking his head, he replied, "No. The door of Your church is as far in as I am welcomed."

Through the semi-opened bathroom door, the steam from the shower escaped and floated phantom-like into the hall. Tendrils of warmth lingered for a moment, then most of them quickly died. Outside a breeze tapped at the window. It blew against a patch of fallen leaves then coiled around the pane – against a sliver of heat that had made its way towards it – the wind hushed down and then went to sleep.

Purgatory roared with life. Saturday night always brought in all the hardcore sinners – those with deep pockets and an insatiable urge to spend. It had once been Sina's night but ever since that bitch with the beautiful mermaid hair had started stripping there, Sina found himself working weekdays when the clientele was scarce and the tips were even more scarce.

Weaving through drunk patrons, Sina made his way to the bar and found a spot at the end of the counter.

"Sinful!" Spotting him, Cody rushed over and grabbed him by his wrist. "I need help with a few things in the backroom. Help?"

Before Sina could tell him he wasn't interested in carrying or cleaning anything, Cody pulled him towards a small storage room and locked the door behind them. "Look." With a huge grin on his face, Cody slipped out a small baggie and waved it in front of Sina's face.

For a second, Sina's eyes went wide but before he got too excited he scowled. "You know I have no cash. What are you going to make me do?" He looked around the messy room. "Ain't cleaning shit."

"Don't want you to do anything," Cody chirped. He clasped a hand on Sina's shoulder. "It's more than enough for two and you know Joni will have a fit if I bring this back home with the baby and all."

Sina narrowed his brows. "When did she turn so goodie-goodie?"

Cody shrugged and sat on a box. "She's a mom now. She's supposed to be dull."

Sitting on the floor by Cody's feet, Sina huffed. "Is that the law?"

"I dunno, man. My mom was as vanilla as ice cream. Wasn't yours?"

Curling a shoelace around his finger, Sina shook his head. "No. She was cool." Feeling the lace cut off the circulation of his finger, Sina tugged so it hurt more. "I was adopted, you know."

Tapping out a small amount of cocaine on a serving tray, Cody paused and looked at his friend. "Had no clue," he said, surprised.

"Don't sound like it's a bad thing. She was fucking amazing. She used to buy me liquor." And opium.

"Where is she now?" Cody asked after he'd laid out four lines.

"Planted in LaFayette Cemetery. She died when I was seventeen."

On the verge of offering condolences, Cody did a double-take. "Huh? On the other side of town? That place has been shut down since 1907."

Sina looked at his finger turning purple. "No. I mean..." unwrapping the lace, he sputtered, "LaFay. The one next to LaFayette." What a fucking idiot you are. He wanted to kick himself. You just admitted your mom died over 80 years ago and that you're nearly an antique. Stupid fuck!

"I'm sorry, Sinful." Cody offered the tray and a rolled-up bill to Sina.

"Shit happens." Bowing into the coke, Sina breathed in two lines before returning the tray and bill to his friend. "It's busy today."

Cody touched the bill to the powder and inhaled deeply. "Yup."

"Shouldn't you be out there helping Isla and Jack?"

"Yup."

"But you're not gonna."

Cody touched his nose briefly. "And that's a hat-trick."

Not really caring if Cody returned to work or not, Sina leaned his head down to his friend's knees.

"What's wrong?" Cody set the tray down and asked.

"Life...or whatever this is." Sina hoped the drugs would begin to work soon then he could erase reality if only for a bit.

"Hmmm...could be worse, I guess."

When Cody slid his fingers through Sina's hair, Sina shivered. "Feels good."

"I know."

"Too bad you don't have hair. I'd do it to you."

Cody chuckled. "I know."

They sat for a moment in a nest of utter silence as Cody continued to run his fingers through Sina's long dark hair.

"Speak fag yet?" Sina asked teasingly.

Chuckling, Cody uttered softly, "Give me a minute." By the way he blended his words so close together, Sina knew he was getting stoned.

"I don't have a minute." Rising on his knees, Sina wriggled between Cody's legs and let his fingers spider-walk up Cody's thigh until they were dangerously close to his dick. "Want me to?"

Euphoria washed over Cody. The coke was doing its job and it didn't disappoint. Leaning back, he forgot he was on a box and not a chair and fell. "Gawdamn it."

Crawling to where Cody lay, Sina lay next to him. He entwined his fingers together and rested his hands on his belly. "Are you still in love with Joni? I mean like you were when you first met her and you told me you felt like you couldn't breathe without her?"

Turning side-ways, Cody nodded. "Yah."

"Even now that she's vanilla?"

Giving Sina a small smile Cody nodded. "Maybe even more so."

"I hate that Areal wannabe," Sina complained, changing the subject.

"I think he hates you too." Cody chuckled.

Sina reached out to wipe away a stray bit of powder from Cody's nose. "Thanks, Cody."

"For what?"

"For not being an asshole. For being here."

"You're too kind."

"Whatever. Thanks for the blow but I'd have been happier if I were able to add job by that word."

Bursting into laughter, Cody clasped his hands over his face. "No one's ever going to call you vanilla, Sin."

"It's my one redeeming quality." Sina rose. "Go the fuck back to work, Del Mar." Giving Cody a wave, Sina unlocked the door and entered Purgatory. 

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