Rise of the Werechipmunks (ONC 2022)

In Which Sophie's Soulmate Might be a Cannibal

 The man frowned so beautifully that Sophie had to stop herself from squeezing out of the car window, leaping into his arms, and offering to give birth to his children—even though she'd never been particularly interested in having kids. She eyed the window. He was her soulmate. Life was short. Maybe she should just go for it.

Before Sophie could move, the man opened his mouth and her body froze. She'd never been so in love. He spoke in a deep, growling voice that made her cheeks flush with heat and said, "You smell."

"Delicious?" She grinned.

"Like day-old meat."

Sophie's heart plummeted to her stomach. She was out of her depth. Maybe she'd been too eager. She was just a normal girl, after all, not particularly pretty or funny. If an alpha werewolf was going to fall in love with anyone, it would be with someone more interesting, more intelligent, and more capable of spitting back proper comebacks in the face of a muscular, dark-eyed man.

"I love day-old meat," the werewolf said. He reached through the car window, grasped her by the collar of her shirt, and bit into her neck.

Sophie screamed.

She'd never really thought much about the whole biting thing she saw in most werewolf novels. True, it was a bit violent. Maybe brutally scarring each other wasn't the most romantic thing ever; Cora thought it was downright abusive, but Sophie felt like that was dramatizing it a bit. At least, that was how she felt before a man with the jaw strength of a mountain lion took a chunk out of her clavicle.

"Holy shit!" Cora said and grabbed a can of pepper spray. Before she could fire, a woman pinned her arms to her aside, shattering the window in the process. Shards of sharp plastic rained down on the inside of the car.

Cora's definitely grounded, Sophie thought, her head spinning.

"You're mine now," the man declared. He wiped the blood—Sophie's blood—from his lips and chin. "Now. How do you know my brother?"

Sophie was pretty sure she couldn't have spoken if she tried. Her hands shook. This was not her love interest, she decided. He was a little too dark-romance-y for her. Maybe she should give Jaxon another chance. 

Cora frowned. "Nathan-Nate-Matt is your brother?"

"His name is Nate-Nathan-Matt actually." The man's copper brown hair glinted in the sunlight. "Or maybe Matt-Nate-Nathan. Something like that."

"I thought he was your brother." Cora eyed him skeptically. "Shouldn't you know his name?"

The man shrugged. "He was only my twin. Not very memorable." He turned to Sophie. "And I'm the only one you'll care about now."

"I told you," Jaxon said. "So possessive. It's why we should destroy the world. Death to wolves!" He clapped his hands like a toddler on his birthday.

"If death is what you wish for..." The werewolf's voice trailed off. Sophie suspected it was for dramatic effect. She would have said something, but her neck felt like it'd been used as a lion's chew toy and she wasn't sure she could talk without choking up. "...then death is what you'll receive."

The werewolf pulled a gun out. He aimed, released the safety, let his finger fall towards the trigger and—

Sophie couldn't help it. She groaned.

The werewolf looked down at her. "Yes, meat? I must murder this werechipmunk, but civility dictates that I must first oblige with my mate's wishes."

"Okay, yeah, um..." Her voice was actually better than she thought it would be. True, it sounded like she'd never studied theater—after four years of intensive study, she was especially talented at projecting her own voice—and her confidence was about as shaky as a newborn fawn in a windstorm. But she could understand her own words, which, all things considered, was more than she'd expected.

"Meat? Did you need something?"

"Well... First, my name is Sophie."

"I like meat better."

Sophie frowned. She had always wanted a pet name, but somehow she'd been picturing something more like babe, sweetheart, or love—not meat. Who was this guy anyway? At least he seemed content to be her soulmate. "Wait—What's your name?"

"Zach-Xavier-Xane. You may call me alpha."

"What if I want to call you sweetheart or something?"

"That's emasculating, so I will skin your friends alive. May I kill the werechipmunk now?" Zach-Xavier-Xane asked.

Jaxon shook his head vigorously. "We've got to destroy the world first and then we can all die and go party in the afterlife. There will be lots of acorns."

"I will eat all of the acorns first, even though they will wreak havoc on my digestive system. Then, I will burn all the acorn trees. And then, I will burn you alive to the sound of Mozart's Symphony No 40." Zach-Xavier-Zane grinned. "I look forward to it, chipmunk."

Cora, who'd been staring longingly at the can of pepper spray lying on the floor around her feet, looked up. "Remind me again why we can't just talk all of this out?"

Sophie twisted her head around, wincing as the skin ripped at her shoulder. Would she turn into a werewolf now? Because she would make a wonderful werewolf. "Werechipmunks want to destroy the world. Werewolves want to save it."

"No, we want to destroy it too," Zach-Xavier-Xane clarified. "But we want to do it with style."

Jaxon rolled his eyes. "It's a long-term plan that involves a global pandemic and lots of...complaining? I think? It's totally boring."

"Fake news," Zach-Xavier-Xane said. "Get the humans to the point where they cannot trust even their governments to tell them the truth and they shall destroy each other."

Sophie winced. "So, just to clarify. You both want to destroy the world?"

"Death! Pain! Fire!" Jaxon waved his arms about like a college student trying to dance after one beer too many.

"Death is life and life is death and it is our holy duty to bring the cycle to an end." When Sophie frowned, Zach-Xavier-Xane sighed, then nodded. "Yes. I want to destroy the world."

Sophie exchanged a glance with Cora. Her friend shrugged. She was deathly pale, her gaze fixed on the still-bleeding wound at Sophie's neck. Sophie met Zach-Xavier-Xane's gaze. His eyes were an all-consuming, void-like black.

Sophie flashed him her very best grin. "What would it take to convince you that the world doesn't need to be destroyed?"

Question of the chapter! In your humble opinion, what is the best Wattpad cliché? What is the worst? 

Word Count: 5489 (ish)

Thank you for reading!

-Harley