Used && Abused

Chapter 21

Breanna's POV

Its early. Its only 8:23 on Summer Break. You'll never catch me up this early. But today is officially my first day of therapy. I pick up my purse and walk out of my room closing the door after me. When I walk downstairs I walk into the kitchen and put a Gatorade, two Nutty Bars, a PopTart, and a bag of grapes in my purse. Then I walk into the living room. My mama is sitting on the couch watching Maury. I walk up give her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Me: Bye Ma. I love you.

Mama: I love you too.

I pick up my keys off of the coffee table and was on my way. I arrived at a building that read Sarah James Therapeutic Center 15 minutes later. I park my car, step out, and walk up the walk way. I walk inside and see the receptionist sitting in her booth on the phone(Not A Cell Phone).

Receptionist: Yes. Thank you. And your appointment is at 12 on the dot tomorrow. Okay thanks.

She hangs up the phone and looks at me.

Receptionist: How can I help you ma'am?

Me: Um. I have an appointment with Mrs. Sarah James at 8:45.

Receptionist: Ah... Yes. Just go through these double doors and make a left. Her office is the first door you'll see.

Me: Thanks.

I follow her instructions and end up at the office door. I hesitate before knocking. She says come in and I do. I walk in and stand behind a chair that I know is set there for me. She gestures for me to sit down and I do.

Mrs. James: Breanna Rogers? Right?

Me: Yes. Thats me.

Mrs. James: I'll like to ask you a couple of simple questions to start off.

Me: Okay

She pulls out a notepad and begins writing something I can't read. I just sit and wait for her to start. She pulls out another sheet of paper and looks like an enrollment form. But I know its not.

Mrs. Rogers: What is your middle name?

Me: Iyanna. Breanna Iyanna Rogers.

MJ: That's a very pretty name.

Me: Thanks.

MJ: How old are you and when is your birthday ?

Me: I'm 17 and my birthday is September 5th.

MJ: Okay. What's your mother and father name.

Me: My mom's name is Michelle Rogers and my daddy's name is-- was Zachari Rogers. He's deceased.

Michelle: I'm so sorry to hear that.

Me: Its okay.

MJ: Since your incident what do you do?

Me: Well, I did draw me and my mom closer. She says I run away from my problems. Like I be with my boyfriend or my friends all of the time. I like if I'm not in the place where it happened then I won't suffer as bad or think about it. That turns out to be false though. I have nightmares almost ever night. I honestly do nothing. I cry and feel a lot of internal pain. I have dreams about it every night.

MJ: Is it a reoccurring dream?

Me: Yes, its the same one every night.

MJ: Tell it to me.

Me: All of it?

MJ: Well, yes. The most important parts. And remember our first step will be Talking About It and Acknowledging.

Me: Okay.

I look down at my pants and start.

Me: In this dream the real me is being abused by Tyler every time. Then there's a fake, ghost like me standing in the corner. The fake me is screaming for him to get up off of her. The real me is screaming for him to get up off of her. The fake me screaming is not working so she runs up. But she's thrown back by an invisible slab of glass covering the bed. Fake me began banging on the glass, kicking it, and throwing her shoulder against it trying to break it. The real me looks at fake me and began whispering, " Help Me. Please". Now I've found out she can see me, but he can't. She stop screaming. No. She stop making all sounds and falls asleep. The fake me thinks she's dead. So the fake me picks up a chair in the room and hits the glass with it. It makes a distant clanking noise. The fake me curls into a ball and just wait for it to be over. And in like 15 minutes it was. He gets up and walks to her dresser picking up the gun. He stands there and watch her for like five minutes. Then she awakes. She looks at the fake me and stand up. The fake me stands up to. I see the pain in the real me as she tries to walk. Real me walks over to the glass and leans her fore head on it. Fake me does the same. Fake me drop to the floor and look at the wall. On the wall is a red button that was not there before. Fake me gets up and runs to press it. The invisible glass lifts up and she runs to embrace the real me. Tyler looks over and sees real me hugging air. He think he's messed her up mentally. He says something and shoots the real me in the head. Real me falls to the floor and her soul enters fake me and then I usually wake up crying. So I have no idea what happens next.

When I'm done I feel my face and notice that its is soaked with tears. I take the sleeve of my jacket and rub my eyes. Even Mrs. James dabs her eyes with a piece of Kleenex. She looks at me and says wow.

MJ: Our time is unfortunately up. But I have two question.

Me: Okay

MJ: Were you still a virgin when it happened?

Me: Yes.

MJ: And, the way you see it happen in your dreams, is that how it actually happened?

Me: I'm guessing yes. Because the way I see the beginning is what I remember it happening as. But I passed out after a while, not being able to take the pain of it. And I don't know what happened then.

Me: Okay. We'll start tomorrow of with an activity. I'm here for you. And I'm here to help you break through and understand. Okay.

Me: Yes.

She stands up and give me a hug. Then she leads me to the door and I walk to my car and drive home. I actually feel better.

Hi Guys... Sorry For Any Mistakes. Enjoy, Like, Comment, And Share.