𝚂𝙰𝙳𝙴 𝙿𝚁𝙰𝙳𝙰𝚈𝙰 𝙶𝙴𝙾𝚁𝙶𝙴 ఌ
March 2019
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"Things have been good. They're better. That's all I can ask for. I still think we've outgrown each other and I don't think I'm ready to accept the fact that there might not be any more of us." Sade vented to Eliana who was writing down in her notebook.
"I feel like me and Kiari just aren't a fit anymore. Like really things have been great between us and we've talked things out. Not entirely but there's an understanding. I love him I do I love Kiari more than I love myself at times. I just don't think that we're right for each other anymore.
I think he was just here to help me. I don't even mean that selfishly but I think that's why he came into my life. Was to help me find myself again and we just so happened to fall in love with each other in the process."
"Why do you feel you two aren't a match anymore? Because of the arguing, bickering, and distance?" Eliana questioned.
"The distance. I've been learning to live without him. I've been learning that I shouldn't be so dependent on him and I think it would be better if we chose not to go down the relationship route again." Sade spoke and it broke her heart to even say it.
Sade knew that the love she has for Kiari was unexplainable and pure, but she had to decide what would be better for her and their baby.
———
"How are things with you and Sade baby? Y'all doing okay?" Kim asked Kiari. She was concerned for her son. He didn't look too well these days.
The bags under his eyes were all she needed to know that things weren't okay, but she still wanted to ask. She wanted him to want help.
"It's been straight." Kiari shrugged. He was tired. Tired of life all in all.
"Don't lie to me. Tell me baby what's wrong?" Kim sat next to him pulling him closer to her.
"I don't know ma." He spoke lowly feeling himself about to cry. Kim knew how to make him feel vulnerable. She was his mother.
She knew what to say and how to say it. Kim wasn't one of those mothers who'd just brush their child off when they didn't want to talk, and she didn't push either. Kim wanted Kiari to equally communicate with her so she could get a better understanding of what he was feeling.
"Talk to me Semaj."
"This shit so hard. I don't know how to be strong anymore. Me and Sade, that shit draining me the fuck out." He shook his head.
"Like shit be good then shit ain't good. Mama, I care so much about that girl. I'd die for her in a given. That shit just doesn't feel returned. I'm starting to wish I would've never got involved with her."
"Don't say that, you can't take it back Kiari. Have y'all not been talking? I thought things were better than before."
"I'm tired of talking. I'm tired of all that shit. She is going to therapy she seems good but I don't think she fucking with it. Being pregnant, me, and us just as a whole. She comes home smiling and happy, then goes right to her room. Like Ma' it's been months. Ain't much more that I can do." He shrugged, feeling defeated.
"Have you both considered finding y'all's place?" Kim asked.
"I wanted her to live with me throughout her pregnancy so she wouldn't be under stress, if she ever got too tired to move, had cramps, and if her water broke. I wanted to be right there."
