HIM

Scared to love

Alaia pov:

I don't need him ...this relationship could not work

I'm shy and then I'm not ...I'm weird and goofy

I like to eat but some days I'll go days without eating

I don't brush my hair everyday...and I am not on birth control

I'm not ready for this and I'm ready for a relationship

He likes me and I like him and I would love for this to work but I know it

He'll get bored and find the complete opposite of me in another girl

He'll be with her instead and he won't want me anymore

He'll get over me and he will move on as fast as lightning

I will miss him after it ends and blame myself for losing him

I will literally fall into despair and it will take me forever to get out of it

It's been that way for years and I doubt it will end this time

I want to be with him but I'm scared he needs to know that

He does now ....I just need him to understand it

I go into his room and he sits up ...he was under the blanket sleeping

Too bad ...

Alaia: mind if I sit next to you

Issac: of course you can ...come on

I climbed up and plopped down next to him

Issac: whats wrong

Alaia: I'm scared

Issac: I -

Alaia: no not about the kidnapping ...I'm scared because I like you

Alaia: I'm scared because I know you'll move on and I'll be left alone

Alaia: I've been hurt so many times that I don't want to go through it again

Issac: I would never get into a committed relationship if I know I won't commit

Alaia: I believe you but -

He grabs my hands

Issac: it's okay...if you don't I understand ...I'll go as slow as you want me to

Issac: as long as I'm with you ...I don't care if we stay friends for years

I smiled and then I cried

He held me and I let years worth of pain, anger, sadness, and worry pour out

Eventually ...I fell asleep and he was still holding me

I came in here at 10am and now it's 4pm

I went downstairs and made myself some cup o noodles

Then I took a shower and get dressed

I choose a high ponytail and a blue dress with a white sweater and some white sandals

I left to go pick up some food from my place and everything that wasn't expired came with me

Then I went to this Korean market downtown and got a whole bunch of stuff

I spent about 200 in American currency

Then I went to Target to get some more hygiene things and brought some medicine

I thought about going to get bc but I didn't know how it would effect my body

I went to the park and swung on the swings for a bit

I went back to the house put everything away and went to my room to sleep

Issac pov:

I woke up confused and worried ...I didn't feel her next to me and I panicked

I jumped out of bed and checked the security cameras

She was out and about pretty much since she woke up

It's about 8 right now and I've been sleep since 10

I need to get her a key to the house so she can stop stealing mine

I take a shower and put on a t-shirt my white silk pants and a robe

I go into my office and get some work done before I make about 4 cups of coffee

Then I go outside to get some fresh air and then I go to check on Alaia

She was sleep and still in her clothes so I took off her shoes for her and put her blanket on her

Then I left and went to the kitchen and saw all the stuff she brought

Then I saw this calender she wants to plan all of our dinner meals

Which is cute

I grabbed apple and then I sat in the dinning room on my phone for a bit

And that's when I heard soft footsteps and she was in the kitchen

My kitchen is not that close to the dining room so she can't see me

I walk in and she looks up and smiles

I sit down and ask her about what she is making

Alaia: It is French onion soup with beef gnocchi

Issac: never heard of the second one but I love French onion soup

Alaia: oh you'll love the gnocchi it's very good and flavorful

Ingredients for Beef Gnocchi:

Ground beef

Basil , 3 garlic cloves , thyme , yellow onions (large)

Beef broth

Gnocchi noodles

Red pepper flakes,  salt and pepper, adobo, Italian seasoning and onion powder

Butter (3tsp)

1 cup of parmesan cheese

I cup of provolone cheese

Ingredients for French onion soup:

Butter(6tsp) either salted or unsalted but unsalted is recommended

8 yellow onions(thinly sliced )

3 bay leaves

Fresh thyme about 3 to 4 sprigs

Salt and pepper

2 cups of dry white wine

8 cups of beef broth (low sodium is recommended)

8 slices of baguette bread (French style)

4 cups of shredded Gruyere

When it was ready she served it and it was pretty good

And took away my runny nose too

We cuddled on the couch until she got up and ran outside

I followed her and she sat down and closed the patio door

She looked up at me after she sat down

I put my hand up and so did she...

Alaia: I'm scared to love you

The end .