recreational idiocy | wilbur soot

𝐭𝐰𝐨

TW // blood

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𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐚

i'm just getting home after work when I hear something hitting the plastic of a green rubbish bin in front of the neighbouring apartment. 

never one to investigate, I'm fumbling for my keys when I hear a soft meowing sound.

it may not seem so bright of me, but I immediately removed the lid from the bin, praying it was only what i thought it was...

only once a ball of ginger fluff all but attacked me in its scramble to leave its containment did I realise my mistake. 

"ah, what the- fucking hell, dude," I mumble to myself, examining my arms. the little furball had broken through the skin of my wrist in several places on my right arm, and had made little claw marks on my left shoulder. small droplets of bright red liquid oozed out of the wounds, running down the length of my arm to my fingertips. 

"you've absolutely mutilated me. respect." I intoned, leaning down to let the now-freed kitten sniff my fingers, which most likely smelled of the sweets I'd indulged in on the way home. once it seemed to decide i wasn't a danger to it, i'm given permission to pet its head. i gingerly lift the tiny animal up and check for its gender; female. 

"now what shall you be called...?" the little kitten meows in response. "blaze, then," I decided on the spot, taking her inside and shutting the door behind us.

"bloody hell... literally" i curse to myself again as i make my way to the bathroom, the newly christened blaze close behind me. i rinse the blood from my arm, a low hiss escaping my mouth at the burning sensation. i search my first aid kit, groaning as i remember using my small supply of peroxide the previous week.

i pull a bottle of rubbing alcohol out from the cupboard. don't be a little bitch, olivia... 

i pour a stream of the substance straight on my arm, squeezing my eyes shut at the pain, my mouth forming an O shape, though i refused to make a sound.

once i set blaze up with a bed made from a few blankets and got her a bowl of leftover soft chicken, I give her a wash. by the time she's safely sleeping in her new home, it's nearly time to get to the pub. my appearance is.. less satisfactory than normal, so I decided I should put a bit of time into getting myself ready.

i carefully pick out my outfit- a brown v-necked blouse, a beautifully flowy sage green calf-length skirt, and some tattered mary janes. i take my time applying sparkly eye makeup, some mascara, etc.

ooh, you're so quirky! cottagecore energyyyy, I think bitterly to myself, looking in the mirror. i shook my head, turning away from both my own judgement and the reflective surface.

once everything is suitable to go out and to my liking, I grab the tote bag I keep hanging near the door for my essentials and head to the pub.

after a short drive, I make it to my destination with time to spare. since I've come so early, i decide to take a few minutes to get myself prepared mentally. even after performing for so long, singing in front of a crowd still gives me some slight anxiety. 

I time my breaths to be slower and deeper, and I let my hands uncurl themselves from fists, breathing in and out. "this is perfectly normal, being a bit scared. your feelings are valid. now stop being a pussy and get out there," I say to myself. 

and with that, i finally exit the car.

the second i walk in, i'm hit with a wall of the scent of smoke. i don't find it entirely unpleasant; it's sort of comforting to me. i'm greeted by the A/V tech who helps me get set up when I do sessions here. "nice to see you again, olivia," he nods toward me, rolling up an extension cord.

"the pleasure is all mine, alex. are you well?" i ask politely, formally, as we aren't really much more than friendly acquaintances. "quite, and I hope the same of you, but I really must be going now.." he finishes, rushing off. 

"well that was a great start to the evening," i mumble to myself. i had maybe fifteen minutes til my set, so I bought a pint and sat down on a stool at the bar. i'm listening to 'father' by the front bottoms when someone taps me on the shoulder. 

i  turn around quickly, squinting slightly at the tall man in front of me. "yes?"

"so it is you, then," he says in response. i'm extremely confused for a moment, but when the man comes into focus, recognition dawns. "you're the caffeine guy! will, isn't it?" he nods, gesturing at the open stool to my right. "mind if I join you?" 

"go ahead, though I've only got ten minutes," I reply. he looks slightly puzzled at this. "I'm here to perform," I explain. 

"really?" he looks a bit amused by this fact, but I brush it off. "no, I just said that for fun. i'm actually here as a hooker," i answer, deadpan. he chuckles, "sorry, stupid question."

i quirk an eyebrow. "i'm being dead serious, william. twenty five dollars for a kiss, but it could be fifteen for you, cutie," i say, causing his eyes to widen in alarm. 

i smile and shake my head, taking a swig from the pint in front of me. "you are so gullible," i laugh at his expression.

"can I request a song, then?" he asks. 

"well, that depends on what you want, pretty boy." I reply, slightly intrigued as to what he might suggest. 

"song for a guilty sadist. crywank, like your t-shirt earlier," he smiles, looking down at me. his arm is resting on the bar, his hand dangerously close to my own. but I am not going to be intimidated by this man i've only met twice. 

"you've got it, stranger," I say, patting his hand and standing up. his eyes flicker to where I touched him, and a slight blush creeps up his face. it looks good on him. 

"see you in the crowd? i'm sure you'll be quite noticeable given your height," he laughs and nods, "i'll be there," he answers as I head for the stage.

once everything's settled and ready for me, i take the mic, sitting down on the stool provided for the entertainment and start introducing myself. 

"good evening guys, I'm olivia burton and I'll be singing for you tonight. so, this first one is called song for a guilty sadist by crywank, and it was requested by a very special person out in the crowd, will something-or-other," i finish, earning a laugh from a few people, will included. 

i blow him an exaggerated kiss and begin playing the intro.