Getting Older- Jiara

Coming Home

*kie pov*

5 years. It's been about about 5 years since the last time I was in Outer Banks. I miss it, I miss the sun shining on my face, I miss the wind blowing in my hair, I miss the beach that I would spend all my time at surfing without a care in the world and watching the waves come and go. But most importantly I miss my friends, the friends that once had my back no matter what and the same friends that I left behind.

I think about them everyday especially at night when the stars are the most active and brightest. I think about John B smile, Pope's nerdiness, Sarah embraces, and JJ stupid weird sense of "humor". I miss it all and I wish I could take it all back, I wish just wish that I would've stayed instead of turning my back on them without saying goodbye.

I hate that I left them, I hate knowing that I once again turned my back on friends and that once again I again lost them. Here I am now sitting in a car on my way back home to the people that I wish I never would've left and the people that I oh so dread of seeing because I don't think I would be able take in the look of dread and disappointment on their faces.

But I know that someday I would've had to face them, I know that someday I would've have to had come home even though I wish I could continue to hide away in New York but I know that it's time.
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*JJ pov*

I still love her, god I can't believe that I still love her. Kiara Carrera, wow even thinking about her name seems weird. Kiara Carrera, the girl who smile I used to couldn't get enough of, the girl who used to brighten up my day with a simple joke, and the lastly the girl who stole and broke my 5 years ago.

I try not to think about her, I try not to think about her stupid beautiful smile, her stupid contagious laugh, or her stupid dedication to saving the planet. I hate that even after all this time I still can't move on from her, everyday I try so hard to think anythiny other than her.

But it seems as the world as other plans for me because I can't- I can't stop thinking about her she's like this parasite that stuck and leaching onto my brain and the worst part about is that don't even think I care.

I don't care that everyday of every hour Kiara Carrera is the only person that I can even think about. I don't care that even though she left me- no abandoned me because all I want to do is hold her and tell her how much I love her. So yeah I'm sitting at the beach under the sun set drinking my life away and thinking about someone who left me.

I used to imagine what our life would've been like if she would've left, imagined that maybe we would've been living our best life partying, drinking, but yet still drinking. I used imagined that we would've been like one of those couples who couldn't stand to be away from each other no longer that 5 seconds, I imagined that maybe just maybe if I had the guts then we would've been married ( at least some version of it).

It's silly right imagining and think about a life that you know would never going to happen but yet you can't but to think of it anyway. So here I am nearly drunk and still thinking about my ex friend, cheers to me right? What a great life I'm living.
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- okay that's chapter 1 so far, I'm might go back and change some things or I might to add more but it's here and I hope you like it ❤️ if there's any changes I need to make feel free to tell me.