Legally Married✔️

Chapter 33

W I N T E R

"Are you alright? You've been quiet all day?" Rachel asked as we sat for coffee at the mall.

"Do I talk nonstop on a regular?" I rolled my eyes.

"Geez seems like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today."  She slurped her iced coffee.

"I'm sorry," I apologized. "So much happened last night and I've still not been able to process it." I confessed.

"So tell me then, let's figure it out together." She advised.

"Well Leo told me he loved me last night." I stared at my plastic cup of coffee.

"And how is that a bad thing?" She interrupted and I glared at her. "Sorry, continue." She smiled.

"Then we met this girl last night." My face changed as I remembered her.

"What girl?" She eyed me curiously.

"I guess her name was Ava?"

She gasped, "Don't tell me that it's Ava Monk?  Brown hair, petit and red lips?" She described and I nodded.

Another gasp escaped her lips. "That girl was obsessed with Leo for the longest time. What did she do?" She placed her cup on the table.

"She came up to our table last night and she was openly trying to flirt with Leo in front of me. You know what's worse? She pretended to not have noticed me sitting there." I narrated.

"Don't tell me Leo let her."

"He didn't. He put her in her place and then she had the audacity to say she didn't see me."

"Okay so what happened next?"

"Leo told her to leave us and then we argued."

"Wait wait wait," Rachel waved her hand in the air. "What do you mean you argued? What'd you fight about?"

"Well w-." I paused to actually think about why I was so upset last night.

"You said he put her in her place so what else happened?"

"I felt insulted by his past. If he had been less of a whore then I wouldn't have had to go through all that."

"I know Leo was messy in the past but he's not like that anymore and he didn't tolerate her humiliating you so I'm still not seeing why you argued." Her expression cold.

"He made me look like an idiot!" I slurped my drink.

"I still don't understand." She frowned. "Are you upset that he had women before you? Or are you actually just jealous?" She eyed me curiously.

"What?" I chocked on my own saliva.

"I get that Ava got you mad but why did you take it out on Leo? Knowing you, you must have said some very hurtful words to him." Rachel nodded her head slightly.

Was I really just jealous?

"I wasn't jealous! I don't care what Leo does with his private life. He's just a nice person but it doesn't mean I like him or anything like that!" I stood my ground.

"When are you going to realize moving on is okay?!" She snapped.

To you it is.

"You think I haven't tried?"

"Yes. You actually haven't tried. You keep yourself buried in your past. Yes, Damian died trying to protect you! You feel guilty, I understand so why can't you forgive yourself for it? It's been more than eight years. You want to throw away your youth?!"

Rachel's words pierced through my heart like a dagger. The only thing that hurt me more is that a part of me wants to hold to what she said even though I know I shouldn't.

After our mini therapy session, Rachel and I walked in silence to different parts of the mall but ended up not getting anything. She didn't talk to me after she gave me a piece of her mind.

Why didn't I shatter like I always do whenever Damian is mentioned? It's quite weird that I feel kind of good?

"What are you going to get for our parents?" I broke the ice.

"They can pretty much afford everything so I think I'll get mom her favorite perfume set and for dad, maybe a new watch?" She answered. "What about you? What are you getting your family?" She asked.

"I'm ordering skin care products from Korea for mom and the girls, I'm not sure what to get dad then for Cassidy and Iris, I guess I'll get them the latest iPhones and maybe a car?" I stroked my chin.

"What about Leo?"

"He's still pretty much upset with me and I really don't know what to get him!"

"Well you only have a couple of days."

When we were done shopping, Rachel and I decided to stop at Burger King where we dined in and both ordered a flame grilled double patty cheeseburgers and onion rings coupled with coke.

"So tell me, what did you say to Leo?" Rachel asked as she took a huge bite of her burger.

I sighed. "He kept on saying things like he understands what I am going through and stuff like that which only infuriated me more so I yelled at him to stop saying things like that since you know, he's never been through that before."

Rachel shook her head in disappointment.

"You should not have done that." She croaked. "You and Leo both really know nothing about each other." She muttered.

"What do you mean?"

"You know the reason why Leo became the the way he is was because he lost his girlfriend. Well I won't really say girlfriend, they never dated but they really liked each other but I guess she was into some shady stuff and she had enemies trying to kill her or something. I heard one of her sisters got kidnapped and then they found her and all but her sister; Leo's lover, died before Leo could even get her to the hospital."

I couldn't help but gape. It sounds kind of familiar but still so distant. One of the girls got kidnapped? But which one? How? I have so many questions but I was overcome with guilt.

Why did I speak to him like that?

I buried my face in my hands and released an exasperated sigh. Everything I said last night kept echoing in my head.

I'm a terrible person aren't I?

**