Didn't we almost have it all

Emma

Jac woke a couple of hours later. Fletch was still there arms around her. She lay for a minute with her eyes closed loving the feeling of being close to and being protected by Fletch.
"Fletch?"
"Hmm?"
"You'll have to let me up I need to pee"
"Oh ok do you need a hand?"
She turned to him and glared
"I'll let you know when I need your help to go to the toilet. You'll know when that is because it will be the day hell freezes over"
He chuckled
"Ok I was only asking!"
He gently got down from the bed and despite her protestations she held on to him to steady herself.
Fletch settled back down in the chair. He'd spent the past two hours savouring the feeling of her in his arms, wondering if they were doing the right thing. Maybe Sacha was right, maybe he was being selfish, denying everyone the chance to say their goodbyes and spend some precious extra time with her but even Jac herself told him not to call in Emma. He supposed it was better to have Jac positive and fighting rather than defeated. She was prepared to take the risk for a chance at a life where she didn't spend her final days bed bound, confused, in pain. Not Jac Naylor - and actually they should all accept that and support her .
She walked gingerly back to bed, pulled the table nearer and picked up a pen and paper
"Shall I pop down to pulses and get coffee and cake?"
"Yes please I'll ha..."
"Extra hot skinny latte and chocolate chip flapjack?" Fletch interrupted
"Oh you know me so well " she said sarcastically
"True story" he said leaving the room
She actually couldn't think of anyone who knew her better.
"Right let's get this written "
To Emma
If  you have been given this letter then it means that the doctors and nurses did not manage to make me better so I have gone to be with the angels
I will always look down on you and you will know that I love you so much
You are my beautiful little girl, my baby. I will miss seeing you grow up and I'm so sad that I won't be there for you.
I know that Daddy loves you as much as I do. Be a good clever girl for him, you are amazing and never forget I love you so so much and wish I didn't have to leave you
Lots and lots of love from Mummy xxx
Tears were rolling down her cheeks  as she wrote this. She knew she would have to trust Fletch to make sure she got this should anything happen to her.
The next one she would have to ask Johnny to give to Emma on her wedding day
My darling Emma
I wanted to remind you how much I love you on your special day.
I know you will make a beautiful bride. and  I  know you will have chosen a kind person to share your life with. You have so much love within you and  deserve love and happiness in return.
I wish you a long and happy life with your partner and wish I could be there to see you
Lots and lots of love from Mummy xxx
She was just stifling a sob when Fletch came back in
"Jac, what' is it ?" He said quickly putting the drinks and cakes down and rushing to her side
"It's ok, I'm ok" she whispered as her once again took her in his arms. She sighed heavily
"Honestly it's ok. I do need to ask a favour of you though"
He moved aside and handed her the coffee
She took a sip
"Fletch  I know that you and I have faith in Elliot but we both know there are still huge risks associated with this operation and if it doesn't kill me the tumour will. Anyway, I've written two letters to Emma . One for if I don't make it and one for her wedding day. I want you to make sure she gets them through Johnny"
The colour drained from Fletch's face
"Bloody hell Jac. You know I'd do anything for you but I won't need to do anything with these letters. We can rip them up together when you're discharged ok?"
She gently laid a hand on his arm " Fletch you know I wouldn't be even trying this if there was any other way to give me a chance but we're out of options and, although I trust Elliot!s expertise it could go wrong and I want Emma to know how much I love her and that I didn't intentionally abandon her like I was"