Daire and Aspen

Chapter 10: Aspen

For the first time since Elly had been born, I'd been out by myself, Daire watching our girl at home. One of his brothers was tailing me, but stayed far enough away that I felt like I was on my own. I had yet to decide how I felt about my protection detail. Cared for? Protected? Not trusted?

After lunch on my own, I'd gotten a to-go sandwich and given it to the surprised tail. Since Daire and I had talked about Elly's baby book, things had been different. Over the last week, every single member of the MC had stopped by one or two at a time, bearing whatever baby gift they'd gotten for Elly that I'd never opened at the shower for her. To say I'd been suspicious was an understatement, but Daire stayed by my side when they came by, not saying much and letting me decide how long or short each meeting was. Each of the brothers apologized for the way they'd treated me, as well as their ol' ladies, if they had one. Even though I knew this was Daire's doing, there was no doubting their sincerity. I didn't trust them, but I felt their...desperation? repentance?...in their apologies.

Tacoma's apology meant the most to me, and when he was at the door to leave, he turned back, his eyes sad.

"I lost Molly over this," he'd said so quietly I almost couldn't hear him. "I didn't believe her when she said she hadn't heard from you, so we fought about that, and she blamed me for losing you. Maybe give her a call, tell her you're back?"

It was a lot to take in, a bunch of hardened bikers asking for forgiveness. But, although I'd not granted them absolution, I had called Molly and we were meeting for coffee today. I was excited about it and when I saw her at the coffee shop, her hug was warm and reassuring.

"I missed you so much," she sniffed into my neck.

"I'm sorry," I told her. "I knew they'd be hammering at you to tell them where I was and I just couldn't risk it. I'm so sorry, Moll."

"Not going to lie -- it hurt, but I also understood."

We ordered our coffees and sat down at a small corner table. I filled her in on everything that had happened since we'd last seen each other a year ago and showed her some pictures of Elly and set up a day for her to meet little miss. 

"So...Tacoma told me you broke up with him over all of this."

Looking down into her coffee cup, I saw the same pain on her face that I'd seen on his when he told me to call her.

"Yeah," she sighed. "You know things weren't great between us since he wouldn't claim me, so this was just kind of the final straw. Daire was having a meltdown and had every single brother running around trying to track you down. Tacoma said he was worried about him because he started drinking every night until he passed out. He kept coming at me, sure I was lying about not being in contact with you. The club was crazy -- nobody wanted to go to the clubhouse since Daire was in such a bad mood and just kept sending the brothers out to look harder if they came back to unwind."

I wasn't sure what to say to that, so I just kept listening.

"One night, about three months after you left, I came to the clubhouse with Tacoma, and Daire got in my face. He was drunk, like seriously out of control, and scared the hell out of me. And you know what Tacoma did?"

I shook my head.

"Nothing." Molly shook her head sadly. "Tacoma did nothing, just let him scream at me until I was shaking. When I finally got out of there, I told Tacoma I was done and to never contact me again. And he hasn't."

"I'm sorry, Molly," was all I could say. I was shocked to hear Daire had done that to her; the man was normally so in control that I was having a hard time picturing it, although I had seen a taste of it since I'd returned.

"Daire did contact me a few days later," she confessed. "He came to see me at my apartment and actually apologized for the way he'd treated me. He told me he was feeling desperate because he couldn't find you and he just snapped that night because he was beginning to feel he'd never find you and I was his only hope."

That stunned me. I'd always pictured Daire calmly hiring private investigators and carrying on with his life and MC business as normal, with the PIs working behind the scenes. I never dreamed he'd tasked the whole MC with finding me or him losing it when I couldn't be found. So much to work through here. Molly and I talked for a little longer and then we both left, happy to have reconnected and looking forward to her meeting Elly in a few days.

I did a little more window shopping for a few hours and then took myself home. As I parked the car in the garage, the door to the house swung open and Daire was there with Elly in his arms. Their smiles were huge.

Elly babbled at me as I rushed forward to kiss her fat cheeks.

"Do I get a kiss, too, little one?" His voice was low and soft, enticing. I'd always been captivated by Daire's voice and it still had the power to make my heart beat faster. He bent down to me, his beautiful lips almost on mine, but giving me the choice.

Without thinking too much about it, still churning over in my mind what I'd learned today, I moved a scant millimeter and brushed my lips quickly against his.

"There's my girl," he murmured, pulling back so he didn't spook me. "Good girls get rewarded," he said with a smirk as he grabbed my hand and led me into the house until we came to the room beside his home office. As usual lately, the door was shut on this room. He stopped beside the door and looked at me, eyes sparkling. "Go on in."

Giving him a questioning look, I opened the door and couldn't help the gasp that escaped my mouth.

He'd built me my dream sewing room. He'd painted the walls a warm sunny color, and one entire wall was shelves that held my material. A long, white table for measuring and cutting material held a brand-new sewing machine. I knew that very machine was outrageously expensive, like five-digit expensive. Behind that table were more shelves that held various scissors and sewing accessories. Even from my quick glance, I knew it was all top-end. My sewing chair look like something from a space-age, futuristic movie and I knew it was ergonomic and comfortable. Next to Elly's nursery, it was quite easily the happiest room I'd ever been in.

"This is amazing. It's perfect," I finally managed to get past the lump in my throat. I'd missed sewing after my other machine had broken, and I remembered when Daire had found me, he quizzed me about all the clothing I'd made for Elly and about that broken sewing machine. "Thank you. This is...the very best surprise. Thank you." I wanted to hug him, but I wouldn't let myself. There was still too much to consider and work through.

"I have a lady coming in next week to give you lessons in the morning on the sewing machine. She'll keep coming until you feel comfortable with it."

"I can't wait," I told him, unable to keep the happiness from my eyes. To alleviate the tension between what I wanted to do and what I would not let myself do, I tickled the bottom of Elly's foot. "And soon, little Miss Elly is going to have a whole new wardrobe."

But Daire, recognizing the dodge for what it was, wouldn't let me have the last word. "I know it doesn't begin to make up for what I've done to you, but I want you to know that going forward, I'll do whatever I have to to make you happy."

That lump in my throat allowed him to have the last word.