Defying Dominance (MxM) (18+)

27

Chapter 27: Jace

I should have known the day would be bad once I found out that both Daniel and Cameron aren't going to be at school today. Sure, Daniel's text makes me smile, and I love the ideas he has, but being by myself at school is stressful.

And then Cameron catches me in the hall to let me know that he's going to take Jules to get her wisdom teeth out.

I almost ditch school entirely, but I want to at least give it a shot-and not be stuck at home with Dad and his glowering. So I head to school despite the pit of dread in my stomach. Something about today just feels...bad, and I can't place why.

Jacque seems to notice my weird mood when I get in the car after him.

"What's up your ass?"

"Today feels...wrong," I say simply, hugging my bag in my lap. "Daniel won't be at school today, and neither will Cameron. I...So it feels weird."

"You'll be fine."

"...I mean, probably, but...I'm just not looking forward to today, you know?"

"Eh. You'll get over it."

"...I thought you were trying to be nice."

Jacque glances up from his phone, frowning. "What did I say wrong?"

"I just...a little sympathy would be nice. Maybe reassurance? You're just dismissing me."

"Oh. I...How do I show sympathy for something that hasn't happened? School is going to be the same it always is for you, even without Daniel and Cameron there. There's your reassurance."

"...Thank you. Any advice?"

"Easy. Don't freak out."

"I guess that's about what I should have expected."

Jacque nods and goes back to his phone, so I turn to the window. A few moments later, my phone dings. A message. From Jacque. I open the link he sent me.

Simple tips and tricks to help manage panic attacks and anxiety.

I smile at him even though he isn't looking. "Thanks."

"Yeah, Max sent it to me with the anger one. Says it's useful information or whatever. I haven't like looked at them or anything. But Max is usually right about this shit. That suffice?"

"Yes, thank you. Really."

Jacque just nods, but I can see him smile just a bit.

I can't stop crying. My chest feels painfully tight and my vision is blurry. I knew today would be bad. I knew it! That guy in the hall just had to open his stupid mouth with that stupid unnecessary comment.

"...Hello?"

I choke on a sob at the voice. Nobody ever comes in here. So why is someone here?

"Jace? I saw you come in here. What's a matter?"

Moth. Why does Moth care? "I...I'm...I'm distressed."

"Well, I know that. But what's wrong? Did something trigger you? If so, I can talk to Rook about it to remove it or give a warning next time so you can step out."

"I...No...No. Not...that's not what...I just..." Seeing those pictures of people in intricate bondage made my mind go blank and I got a hard-on in class and got all dopey-eyed! "I don't wanna talk about it..." I grumble.

"That's okay. Even if you don't want to talk about specifics, you wanna come to Rook's office with me? Even if you don't want to talk about exactly what happened, you can talk through your feelings about it with him."