Dear BTS,
My birthday was recently, just a few days after Yoongi's actually. Only three people actually wished me a happy birthday: my mother(of course), one of my brothers, and a friend. The friend wasn't even my best friend. She still hasn't even said anything, I'm feeling very disappointed with her. The brother that wished me a happy birthday was so ridiculous. He said something while my mom and I were out of the house, and he didn't even ask before just showing up at the house. The house was empty and he said he'd come by to drop off a "gift," and because his friends are a higher priority, he took his drunk friend home and didn't see me until the next day. His gift had been $45, I found out it was originally going to be $20. I earned more than that in a few hours of work in my previous toxic workplace. I'm an adult but he treats me like I'm still a child. My other brother had waited almost four days before he and his wife wished me a happy birthday.
It's not necessarily that I consider such a little thing as so important but it's extremely eye opening. For the past couple years my mom and I have worked hard to give them very good and meaningful gifts for the holidays and their birthdays. I even went a little overboard for my best friend's Christmas presents. The effort and care that have gone into these relationship clearly are not being reciprocated. I want to start over, have more friends but I barely even leave the house and of course its a pandemic.
I don't know what it is. All week I've not felt any motivation. Only now that I'm listening to your music do feel something. More than ever I'm glad for your music to help me feel better.
nSEp
