Swapped ☹ Muke

19

:: Luke ::

I slipped off the bracelets and thought nothing of it because there was nothing there, at lease on the outer side of his arm it was clean. As I slowly flipped my wrist, careful of the possible fracture, I watched a tear drip down upon the skin making me hiss. Pink and white lines laced his pale skin -- they didn't look new no, but there was a hell of a ton of them.

"M-Mikey?" I asked, my voice cracked but I didn't really mind simply because I was more concerned about the boy who's body I happened to be occupying.

He didn't mind me, instead he was looking at the floor with a pained expression.

"Michael you said you did it again, so why is it clean?" Ashton demanded grabbing the boys chin and forcing him to look at him.

So he had a past of this?

Of course he did, how oblivious can you get?

Apparently pretty fucking oblivious.

"Michael, Mikey, kitten, baby -- please talk to me," Ashton rambled holding Michael in his arms -- like that would do any good because he was basically holding me. "Babe, you've got to talk to me. I need to know whats wrong, do you need to start taking your pills again? Please kitten you've got to help me out here, we can't do this again." He pleaded, his tears were dropping onto Michael's shoulders as he'd clutched him tightly.

For some reason I was enraged, sure I may or may not have some minor feelings for Michael but that doesn't mean I should be mad that Ashton's calling him babe.

Wait fuck, I know what this feeling is.

Ding ding Lucas, just know I'm slow clapping and backing away slowly.

What the hell, pft, I'm not j-jealous.

Fuck.

"Mikey, why?" Ashton sobbed, honestly the sight was heartbreaking.

Ashton rarely broke down simply because he was like the parent of the band, he was strong for us and rarely showed weakness unless it was very important to him. Now I'm watching him bawl his eyes out and plead for answers, and well it's defiantly a sight to see -- and not a pretty one.

"L-Luke, h-hate, st-stupid, worth-worthless, tired." Michael whimpered as my heart finally felt as if it were hanging from a single thread.

This was my fault, I pushed him too far and I didn't even realize it.

"Shh, kitten hey look at me -- you're not stupid or worthless. You're perfect and everything more and I don't care what those fake ass fans or Luke say. You're beautiful with your colored hair and red lips, and if you ever feel gross, ugly, stupid, worthless, anything negative just remember how much Calum and I love you -- the fans love you. You're not fat love, sure you're not as fit as Calum, you're not as long legged as Luke, but you're not fat -- nowadays I'm scared to hug you because you've transformed yourself into a skeleton."

"Mikey that's not heathy, sure Luke may say you're fat but you're not, babe you're a fucking twig -- a beautiful pale boy with an angelic voice and a killer smile. But you don't use that voice anymore Mikey, the only time you speak anymore is to back talk Luke or sob in your room, you scream your heart out and it breaks me. And you don't fucking smile, god Mikey I miss your smiles so much, it always brightened my day even on my darkest days you made all seem right when you smiled."

A-and I miss your laugh, not that fake thing you often do but the real Michael Clifford laugh where you got breathless and hand to hold onto Calum for support, I fucking need that in my life. And you better fucking listen closely, the fans don't hate you -- they just know you take things more to heart, they try to break you down for not following all the millions of them because they're selfish. But most importantly Luke, yeah he's rude and a total asshole towards you."

Yeah, I seem to understand that I'm a douche could you not rub it in my face?

"But the thing is, -- hey kitten look at me -- he doesn't know how to handle his emotions, he may be super fucking mean and act like you're worthless to him but he doesn't mean it. You hear me? It's an act, he's been masking his emotions for months Michael, okay he fucking loves you with all his heart. He just doesn't want to admit his feelings for you, he's in denial okay. Don't let him get to you, because by the end of the night he stays up late crying and writing love songs about you that occasionally end up on the albums." He concluded as Michael had tears streaming down his cheeks.

Ashton looking at Michael and wiped away the tears that had tainted his cheeks.

It was silent as they looked at each other, my heart was aching with jealousy and remorse and all I wanted was to hug him, to tell him I'm sorry, to erase all the scars I created on him, to love him like I should.

"But Ashy, you're not supposed to break what you love. Y-you're supposed to hold it close and care for it with your everything, and with people you're supposed to hold them, show theme you love them, not slam their heads into the ground and send them to the hospital. But that's all he's ever fucking done for me, a-and I'm tired of being used by somebody I used to love. I'm a person not a fucking ragdoll, and if he really loved me he would've thought of that earlier." Michael began softly but his voice gradually grew louder with a passionate rage.

"Baby, it'll be okay." Ashton whispered pulling him back into his arms and rocking their bodies gently from side to side. "Somebody will be there to piece you together, even if happens to be me."