Swapped ☹ Muke

21

AYY I started another fic and you should totally check it out and give me ship suggestions because I haven't decided yet :-)
:: Luke ::

Since this body swap I have never wanted back in my body more.

Sure it's different that I happen to be in the body of the dude I've like for years now and that's pretty fucking cool, but when he's breaking down in your arms and exchanging soft kisses between the two of you it sucks. Because all I want as of now is to prove to him how much I love him but that can't be done when I'm in his body.

That would be awkward as fuck.

"Hey Lukey?" He whispered looking up at me with wide eyes and furrowed eyebrows.

"Yes kitten?" I asked kissing him on the forehead -- hey it may have been myself but it's the thought that counts.

"I just don't understand it, why do you always hurt me if you love me? I've never hurt anybody I've ever loved."

I cringed sharply at what he said because I didn't even understand why I hurt him, and I couldn't exactly use the "if a boy is mean to you then he likes you," excuse because that's such a primary excuse. I guess I couldn't really explain to him why because I happened to still be figuring that out.

Like there's probably a million petty reasons why I did it, but there's probably two million logical reasons not to have done it.

See sometimes I was jealous of how outspoken and confident he was.

But sometimes I simply wanted him to be jealous of me so he would give me the attention I craved.

Sometimes I wanted to slam his head against the lockers, but other times I wanted to pull him into my arms and kiss him passionately.

But still they were completely and utterly stupid reasons to harm such an innocent person like Michael.

Though those thoughts quickly faded as I realized something he'd said and suddenly it was echoing in my head, "I've never hurt anybody I've ever loved."

He's hurt me so many fucking times I can't even count it, maybe not physically like I've done to him but emotionally he's drained everything within me. And right now would be a perfect example, because I've spent years striving for his love -- maybe not in the best way possible -- and he just said it.

He's never loved me.

"Lukey you okay?" He asked poking my cheek which brought me back to the reality of the moment. "Why are you crying love?"

Love, you hear that Lucas he's toying with your emotions.

He doesn't deserve to call me that, but I couldn't help feeling likes was on cloud nine as I shot him a weak smile. "Y-yeah I'm fine, and seriously Mikey I'm sorry, god I'm so sorry."

He giggled and brushed our noses together in an eskimo kiss and looked me dead in the eyes, "I won't hold a grudge on you Lukey, I happen to really like you even though half of the time I'm either terrified of you or mad at you -- I really do like you."

Ouch, he's scared of me.

"Well kitten I happen to love you." I smirked making him bite back a smile as he toyed with the black hoop in his lip.

"Do you know how bad I want to say the same for you?" He asked and I shook my head. "So fucking bad with my all, but I just can't do it yet, I need to trust you before I can say I genuinely love you."

"I know kitten, and that'll probably take a lot of time but I'm going to be here for the time being with a big smile on my face as I do everything possible to earn it from you." I whispered pulling him in for another hug as we sat in a beautiful silence of our bodies pressed together as they've always been meant to be.

Because in that moment of perfect I came to an important conclusion and the key to fixing this mess, and this whole time it was right there plain and simple.

No it wasn't exactly getting to know each other because trust me we have, a bit more than we'd bargained for because I'd never intended for him to know my sexuality and I'm sure he didn't want me to meet Gordon. But the thing getting to know each other personally finally brought us a step closer to getting to where we need to be.

The key to being swapped back to ourselves was simple; we had to exchange our "I love you's," and mean it with our all.