Yellowed

Chapter 11; A Harp's Tone

The days approached fast, and I just realized that today was the last day of midterm exams. Even though I was almost two weeks late, I managed not to be left behind in all lessons. And now, as I began to gently plow this garden with its wilted flowers, Mr. Gray arrived. And just like every time I saw him, my heart skipped a beat, and I always felt I had done something wrong, especially after that day that we went to my brother's grave. 

"I guess we've all been busy, huh?" he said as he casually walked toward me. I admit it, I again expected to smell that brand of cigarette in him, but I didn't. He smelled just like all the other days. 

"Oh, Mr. Gray, you're here. Yeah, you know, because of the midterm exam," I said, trying to avoid looking into his eyes. 

"I see. But I'm happy that you manage to make the garden bloom with flowers," he then showed me the picture I sent him weeks ago. 

"Yeah, but It's unfair that you don't have the chance to see them that day. Now it's wilted and some are already dried," I said.

"There's a lot of things that I have to do. I'm sorry," he replied, making me a little guilty. "And you students seem to make fighting a normal thing huh?" he continued. It's true. I heard it almost every day. 

"Well, I guess that's just the way how people deal with problems nowadays, aggression."

"I guess you're right," he said as he released a contented sigh. 

"You must be really stressed because of that," 

"No, not really," he began plucking the dried stems of the flowers, then asked me a question I didn't know how to answer.

"So how are you?" he asked, not looking at me. It took me almost 30 seconds before I answered. 

I looked at him, but he was still focused on the dried flower.

"I... I'm good. Yeah, I think I'm good," I said, trying to sound casual, but the more I tried, I think the more I failed to do so. 

"You know you don't have to be okay all the time right?" this time, he looked at me, half-smiling with the sun hitting his face. I can see that his eyes are not black but brown, almost like the color of the bark of an old tree. I was about to say that I understood, but he pulled out a flyer from his pocket and handed it to me. It was a flyer for the university talents night.  

"I want you to join this year's talents night," he said, changing the rooftop vibe.

"I don't think I have any talents, to begin with, Mr. Gray," I chuckled. 

"Really? I don't believe you."

"Yeah, I don't sing. I don't dance."

"Well, singing and dancing aren't the only talents that can be shown on the stage. Last year we had a student who breathes fire and there's even a full band," he explained. "Do you know how to play any instruments? Guitar, piano, flute?" he eagerly said while looking directly at me. 

At this time, I could see that he really wanted me to join.

"But I don't..." I suddenly remembered that I used to play the harp together with my brother. "Harp," I said softly.

"What was that?" Mr. Gray said, taking a step near me. 

"I used to play the harp before... With my brother," I can see that he is slightly surprised by what I said. He kept looking at me but didn't say anything. It seemed like he wanted me to continue, so I did. "My brother used to play the cello because he was a member of the orchestra, making my father very proud of him while the stupid me became more jealous, so eventually I told my Mom that I wanted to play an instrument too. And she told me that she used to play harp before. She's the one who teaches me," I let out a huge sigh after saying that. I'm also surprised that I could tell that story to anyone, let alone my teacher.