Matters of the Heart (Marianas Trench/Josh Ramsay)

Chapter 1

Chapter 1

(October 28th, 2010)

He stared up at the ceiling, watching the fan rotate around the dark room. The constant sound that once used to lull him to sleep now only irritated him- Swish, swish, swish. How the hell had this ever helped him to sleep? He grabbed the controller from his nightstand and turned the fan off, throwing it down on the ground with a loud thud. He sighed, leaned his head back against the pillow, and tried closing his eyes once more.

Insomnia had always plagued him, and tonight was no exception. After another ten minutes of tossing and turning, he rubbed his face with both of his hands in defeat. Get a fucking grip, man. He chastised himself. A lack of sleep is not going to magically fix the problem for you. His tired eyes slid across to the desk and laptop on the other side of the room. The laptop was closed, a clear indicator that work for the day was over. However, he knew if sleep were to come tonight, he’d have to turn it on once more.

He pushed the covers off of him, and gave a quick stretch before getting up and walking towards the desk. His, or rather, the whole band’s manager, Johnathan Simkin, was awaiting a reply via e-mail about when recording would begin for the next album. He scowled at the thought and turned on his laptop. The computer screen temporarily blinded him, forcing him to rub his eyes once more to allow time to adjust to the brutal light. There was no need to open up his mail, however, as the email was already projected on the screen.

Hey Josh,

Everything has been confirmed for the Directors Cut of Masterpiece Theatre- we are expecting it to be released on November 30th. Should hold the fans over for a while. Speaking of, have you and the guys decided when to start recording? Just a reminder, the tour ends December 18th in Vancouver, so we will need to know by then what the plan is. The label groupies are starting to get a little over anxious that you haven’t decided on anything, but I keep telling them there’s nothing to worry about. Keep the fans wanting more is what I always say, eh?

-Simkin

He scrolled up to the top of the page and clicked the “reply” button. The dreaded blinking line appeared, waiting for his answer. Waiting for him to fix all the problems with his words of assurance, that a date had been decided upon and that the material for the next album was overflowing.

He had nothing.

It had been over a year and a half since the band’s last album, Masterpiece Theatre, had been released to the world (a year and eight months, to be exact). He should be ecstatic, he mused, his head resting on one hand while the other drummed against the desk. They were in the middle of a tour that would be finishing up in December, and the month before they had finally had their first performance in America. From an outsider’s point of view, Marianas Trench was well on their way to the big leagues of the music world.

If he didn’t screw it up, that is.

He groaned and put his face in his hands. The big timers at their record company, 604 records, wanted a completed album by June 2011, a mere eight months away, and Josh had nothing. Not a single lyric, tune, or note. It was the worst case of writer’s block he had suffered in his life. He had tried everything he could think of to break it- taking a break, focusing on the tour, spending time with family and friends- but whenever it came time to sit down and write, his mind would go blank and the anxiety would build up to the point of being so overwhelming he had to walk away again.

He faced this anxiety now, staring through his fingers at the blinking line on the reply page, the deadlines hammering in his mind, the group’s faith in him building pressure in his chest. Josh exhaled loudly, sat up straight, placed his fingers on the keyboard, and began to type what he could only hope to be true.