School Days

A Minor Mishap in Culture

A Minor Mishap in Culture

Seán talks culture, and embarrassing moment and asks a little about life down south.

Seán is pronounced "Shawn".

Seán's P.O.V.

"Good afternoon, Mrs. Alton."

"Afternoon, Trapp."

"I assume this is for my interview?"

"Yes, have a seat."

*Seán takes a seat in the chair, doing his best to appear calm."

"Will I be talking about something specific?"

"Yes, what happened in the last few days before the events that led to Friday?"

"Well..."

It was Friday of third week at school; I was with the others at the playground after school, hanging out and having fun as usual. We were discussing random things and the subject of the south and life there came up. "Hey Seán, been wanting to ask you, how's life been down here? Besides almost boiling to death and kudzu attacks." Freddy asked. "It's been fun. The people are nicer than back home, and everyone's super warm and welcoming, and it's sunny and warm."

"Wait five minutes and see if it still is." Chica cut in. "Why do you say that?" I wondered. "Because southern weather is more schizophrenic and random than me." Jason answered. "Wow; oh well, better than our scammy weather. It looks lovely like beach weather outside, but really, it's cold enough to freeze your tails off, and I'm surprised all of England isn't demanding their money back from the British Weather." The others blinked a bit. "Sounds like Texas weather but always cold." Fionn said. "I have to ask though, since I'm here. How does the whole manners thing work? And what does "bless your heart" mean? 'Cause some girl said that to me after I tried to pull open a "push" door. "I asked. "Bless your heart can mean many things, Seán." Fionn explained, patting me on my back for some reason. "In that instance, she was saying you're an idiot." I dropped my shoulders slightly. "Oh..."

"You and Marionette have a lot to learn about Texas and the south." the redhead stated, sitting himself on the edge of a rock with his eldest brother. "Yeah, for starters, ma'am, sir, miss and sweetie." Chica began. "Ma'am?" I asked. "Yes, ma'am, and sir. If she's older than you, it's ma'am, and same for sir. No exceptions. Especially if they're dead."

"What about miss and sweetie?"

"Miss is for little girls that're younger than you and for calling your childhood friend's mother by her first name."

I blinked in confusion. "Miss is for using your friend's mother's first name, like Miss Auri is what you could use to call my mom." Freddy explained, much to my happiness. "And sweetie is for grandmother figures to use for you only. Do not go using it for people like Chica or a Buc-ee's cashier."

"Bucc-ee's?"

"Gas station down south. Really popular here." Jason said. "Cool. Anything else I need to know?"

"Manners are essential; forget and die."

"We speak really weirdly VS you, biscuits are savory here and go with gravy, color has no U, chips are thick and fries are thin, crisps are thin and crispy, the boot is the trunk and Nilla Wafers go on the bottom of banana pudding." Freddy summarized for me. "Nilla Wafers go on the top." Chica retorted. "Nilla Wafers go on top, bottom and the middle." Bonnie cut in.

"Top."

"Bottom."

"Middle."

"Top."

"Bottom."

"Middle."

"Top!"

"Bottom!"

"Middle!"

"What are "Nilla Wafers" and what's banana pudding?" I asked the trio, hoping to defuse the tension. They all turned and stared at me like I was insane, like, crazier than Jason. "You...don't know...what Nilla Wafers, and banana pudding is..." Bonnie spoke. I nodded, and then he crushed me in a hug. "You poor poor bunny. We're making banana pudding when we get home." he stated. "And where will we put the wafers?" I asked, receiving "the middle" as my answer.

"Top."

"Bottom."

"Middle."

"On top!"

"On bottom!"

"In the middle!"

"Y'all are overcomplicating it; the only wrong way to do banana pudding is to eat it with forks. You use a spoon, and a big one at that." Fionn voiced, taking out a box of banana pudding filled with wafers on top, underneath and in the middle, and eating it with a spoon right before us. "May I try?" I asked, to which Fionn shoved a spare spoon of pudding into my mouth. "You poor starved bunny, have it all." he said, shoving another spoonful into my mouth. I just, let him, and stood there as he awkwardly fed me pudding until I finally raised my arms in defeat and sat back down. "It's good." I complimented, happy with the food. Fionn seemed pleased with that, which made me happy. It was really just the last time we got to hang out together without a care in the world, and I miss it a lot...every time we're together it's just a suffocating feeling of fear over what happened.

"That's all that really happened in the week before; nothing much to talk of, but it was nice to talk about; feels good. Do you need anyone else now?"

"Yes, Crew Lockman, please."

"Alright, I'll go get him."

Author's Note.

Slight polishes.

A few clues here and there but mostly relaxed and calm...strangely... Also, I'd like to thank It's a Southern Thing for their sketch "Things Southerners Say in the Kitchen" for the Nilla Wafers debate and for their southern culture stuff in general; it's a massive help.