Talking to the stars (5sos Fanfic)

Chapter Fifteen

Michael's POV
I couldn't sleep all night. My eyes were wide open and my mind was so loud. I couldn't take it anymore.. I continued to stare at my black ceiling. Then i decided to make some hot chocolate to calme my nerves.. I got of my bed and headed for the kitchen.

Victoria's POV
I woke up in the middle of the night feeling dehydrated and my throught felt as dry as a desert. I decided to get some water to quench my thirst.. to the kitchen i went..

Michael's POV
I heard footsteps coming down the stairs.. In the dim light, i couldn't see who. I didn't want to be questioned on why i was up at this late hour, so i ducked under the counter.. the footsteps got louder and louder by the second.

Victoria's POV
I saw dim light in the kitchen. Seems like the stupid boys forgot to close it. I rounded the corner of the L shaped counter to find a body on the floor looking up at me.. i screamed and suddenly i felt the person's hand on my mouth stopping me from screaming. I hit him with my elbow. jackpot! i hit him right were it hurts. he bent clutching his torso. i took the chance and pushed it to the ground. i grabbed a knife and dashed to the light switch, flipping it open.

A wave of shock and guilt rocked through my body, making me drop the sharp edged knife i was holding. I stood there not moving.
"So are you gonna help me up or what?!" he asked
" ummm...." I stuck out my hand reaching for his. Helping him up, i grunted at how heavy he was.
He slipped from her grip and fell on his ass. I became unbalanced and was going to fall on top of him, but caught myself just in time, stumbling.
"Why do you have to be so heavy?!" i asked childishly.
He chuckled in response, making me half smile.
He stood up on his own.
"and you couldn't do that from the beginning?" i asked exasperated.
"so what are you doing down here at a time like this?" he asked as if nothing happened.
"what are 'you' doing?" i asked challengingly emphasizing the 'you' part.
"i asked first."
"fine! I was getting a cup of water. Now answer the question!" i said irritated.
"not much j-just getting a cup of hot chocolate." he stutters.
"Marshmallows.. in the middle of the night? what craving it?" I joked.
He laughed.

Michael's POV
Seeing her joke and smile makes me so freaking happy and my heart flutters. I find myself staring at her and smiling. my eyes move from her electic blue eyes to her plump, pink, full, lips.. i just wanna.. no.. I shouldn't be thinking like this.. she already has a boyfriend and i bet she doesn't think of me that way.... Why would she? She has James and he took her on a date, while i stayed at home freaking out! no no no i can't just stay like that. I need to talk to her. i need to tell her she is not safe.

" Tori? "
" yes "
" why did you go out with him? "
" what? "
" you heard me "
" ummm... well.... I actually had a crush on him " and that's when my world just collapsed. She actually likes him. He didn't make her come with him she likes him! That's too much to handle. I got even more mad at myself. she cut my thoughts.
" umm... Michael you okay? "
" y-yeah i'm tired i'll go to bed " I stuttered and began walking not saying any other word.
i heard her whispering a goodnight.

I went to my room and into the bathroom. I sat on the floor and everything started again. My thoughts. am i not good enough for her? am i that bad? I shouldn't be thinking like that. That's the old Michael. I can't go back to be like that i can'- But i can't stop myself and i kept on thinking and thinking about her.
I love her. yes i do. I don't only like her, I love her! I can't take this anymore.

Memories filled my brain and i couldn't stop them. I found myself looking for something i didn't use in ages. A razor. I shouldn't do tha- Damn! I need to do it. My body is itching for it. I slowly walked again to my spot and sat down. I softly put the sharp edge of the razor on my skin and deeply start to cut.

1 for being stupid
2 for not expressing my feelings
3 for being a jerk and not asking her out
4 for again being stupid
and i went on and on, until i felt numb. I sat there emotionless, heartless and painless. All thoughts came back again. I felt tears on my cheeks and that was something i barely do. Cry.
After a couple of minutes or even maybe hours, i stood up and cleaned my mess and the blood that was all around the floor. I slowly tucked myself in bed and slowly drifted to sleep with my heart ripped into two halfs. I need her.