"Don't bring her into this." I said to Clip. "Vae go eat." I added waving her off. "Bitch I wanna see." She said as I looked at her crazy.
"Never mind I'm going." She said walking into the house. "Look Clip, you cute and all but I'm really not fucking with you no more." I said preparing to walk back into the house. This nigga grabbed my arm and spent me around.
"Fuck is up with you? Matter fact you knew you wasn't gon fuck with me since this morning. All I did was give you a reason." He spoke.
I mean he wasn't lying tho. "Meaning you don't have no right to come shoot my crib up like I'm yo girl. Especially when you tonguing down bitches in taco spots." I spoke truthfully.
He sat there and looked at me. "I want you tho dawg." He said with his dimples peering. Them dimples lawd he know what he doing.
"So why did you kiss her?" I asked. I mean I'm not his girl granted but he shooting my shit up like I am he might as well give me a answer.
"Cus I was bored and she been on my dick for a while. I'm just conversating with her til you stop playing and ready to be with a real nigga." He said.
Mane niggas will tell you anything. "Okay well with all due respect sir, I'm not tryna fuck with you." I said looking him dead in his face. He kissed me in my mouth and gaw damn I kissed back.
"God damn bitch you being weak in the knees stand up!" Nevaeh yelled from inside the house. "My bad shorty. Me and ha won't even happen no more. Cus I want you in real life." He said charmingly. I can't lie that did sum.
"Aite?" He asked. "Ok." I said. "And start answering yo mother fucking phone Andrea. He said pushing me inside the house. I watched him walk back to his car and drive away from the window.
"You so damn stupid." Vae said to me as she walked up the stairs. "Excuse you hoe, who I fuck with is not your business." I stated honestly.
She came back down the stairs like she wanted to do something. "What?" I bucked at her. "You don't neva want to hear what I gotta say but I always gotta deal with yo shit. And you know I'm right." She exaggerated.
"Because it's not your business what I got going on." I stated. "Oh and what I do involves you? Fuck on." She started. "Next time ima just let yo dumb ass look stupid since you gon be stupid anyway." She finished as she walked back up the stairs.
Those words burned me because I know she ain't lying. Nigga can fill ya head up with anything and make you think you the one and only. Whole time he sitting there telling the next bitch the same thing. But it wasn't like I believed him, I guess that's what make me stupid tho. I know he ain't doing right but I still choose to deal with him.
I grabbed my keys and walked out the door. I'm going to go see the only person I could confide in when everything's going wrong.
Driving down this long ass alley way always send me into deep thought. I sometimes drift off somewhere else because of how comfortable I am with driving down this street, it's so empty.
I got our the car, grabbed some flowers from the garden, and headed across the street to the cemetery to find my favorite lady. I see her sometimes, I wonder if it's a figment of my imagination or if she's really there waiting for me to go home with her.
I sat next to her tombstone, I can feel her presence. "Ma, I miss you. And I know you know that because I say it all the time..." I can feel the tears poking at my eyes. "I just wish you were here to guide me again. Tell me what to do , why did you leave? Why you leave me to put the pieces together by myself? Vae has me but I don't have nobody. Dad can't teach me how to be a woman. Where are you ma? I need you. I'm being delusional behind a boy that could give not shit about me. His words I find comfort in but his actions are so much different ma. And my heart just wants to be filled again, like how it was before you left."
