limerence | timothee chalamet

chapter 11

The next few days have been quiet. I've seen Timothee around but I won't dare to make eye contact with him.

Ryder has been blowing up my phone so much I blocked his number. He tries to talk to me at school but I ignore him.

I've just been doing things for myself and hanging on with Sam. There's not much I even can do because why would I entertain Ryder and why would I try to get answers from Timothee. I don't even want to know why he did what he did.

Faking interest in someone and then getting with someone else is sociopathic. I guess I did dodge a bullet.

I'm in the library doing my homework. Laptop open and coffee sitting next to it with my notebook in front of my laptop. I have my headphones on to drown on the one or two loud people in here.

I'm writing down notes as I see it get darker in front of me. Someone's standing in front of my desk. I slowly look up to see Timothee.

I don't say a word I just shake my head repeatedly so he will get the hint to leave. I don't want to talk to him especially not in the library. He has a pathetic frown on his face with his hair messier than normal. He looks rough. Not my problem.

I look down at my notebook and continue writing, ignoring him. He finally leaves after a minute.

I continue to do my work trying not to think about that encounter.

As I walk out of the library, Timothee runs up to me. What the fuck. Was he waiting for me to finish?

"Blair please, just hear me out," he pleads.

I freeze in front of him. "No Timothee, I don't want to hear anything you have to say. You can't excuse that behavior."

"Blair, I'm scared. I was terrified and I made out with a girl whose name I don't even know. I never spoke to her in my life and I never spoke to her after. It meant nothing. I just did it without thinking." He explains to me while he runs his fingers through his thick curly hair.

I bite my lip trying to think of what to even say to that.

"Scared of what?" I dare to ask.

"I'm starting to really like you. Like actually. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with this because I'm not a dating type of person."

"Honestly Timothee, I don't want a relationship. I'm terrified now because of what my ex did and what you did. So do whatever you desire and I will too. I'm not looking for anything." I explain to him as I storm off through the doors to my car.

Is that even how I feel?