Fireworks 3 and 4

Chapter Twenty

    When Bri emerged from the hall, Mia was leaning against an apartment door she'd closed only moments before. "Hey, girl."

    Mia opened her eyes and smiled weakly. "Hey."

    Bri tilted her head to the side, then clucked her tongue as she walked up to her friend. She reached out and wiped the remaining tears on her friend's cheeks.

    "That was very...motherly of you," Mia said, laughing through more tears that were coming.

    Bri rolled her eyes and shrugged. "This mommy shit...it's not a button I can turn off. Which is annoying as fuck, really. I feel like I'm everyone's mom, hell. But you look like you're really going through it. We might not spend every waking moment together anymore, but you're still my girl, you know?"

    Mia nodded and stared down at the floor.

    "So you're not going to run back to him, I take it?"

    Mia sadly shook her head.

    "You want to, though?"

    Mia nodded again.

    "So why don't you?"

    "Because I can't."

    "Because you're a stubborn ass bitch." Bri nodded knowingly. "I know all too well."

    Mia laughed again and wiped at her eyes. "I feel this...need to become the biggest female artist out there. I've never felt that way before. It was about the art. It was about creating something beautiful, something bigger than myself. And now I feel like I have to be like, this... force to be reckoned with."

    "I heard you mention Nicki and Rih."

    Mia wrapped her arms around herself.

    "Do you seriously feel like you have to compete with them?" Bri asked her. "Knowing that he's had his chance with both of them and it never lasted? I mean, he and Rih tried how many goddamned times? Couldn't even make a kid out of that shit. Seriously. Over how many years? But here he is with you, always fighting to keep you. Always fighting to make things right with you. Practically begging you not to leave him and shit, like..."

    "It's just like what you said about being a mom," Mia said softly. "When he and I were going through it, there was this fire that rose up within me, this fire that burned and pushed me to want to be this huge entity, and now that things are okay between him and me, it doesn't douse out that fire. That fire still burns, and that fire is still driving me to take my career to new heights. As much as I want to run into his arms and have him just hold me, that fire within me doesn't have a button that I can switch on and off. There are things that I want to do now, and I can't rest until I've done them."

    "Shit, then I'm going to pray for you both," Bri muttered, her brow creased with worry.

~~~~~~

    Chubbs and Tank knew better than to speak right awhile. The first half of the ride back to the airport was quiet, nothing but ambient sound and the wind rushing past the car barrelling down the highway.

    Drake sat in the backseat, lost in his own thoughts and misery. He stared out of the back window, remembering all of the recent mistakes he'd made in regards to the relationship that he had with Mia. She blamed herself at least partially for the predicament they were in; she had said as much. But really, she shouldn't have been able to coerce him into an arrangement that he felt was wrong. Nothing good could have come from an agreement with Rihanna. Sure, a few gossip blog hits, a ton of the "Aubrih" fanpages linking them together and flapping their gums a bit, flexing on social media. The "Aubrih" dream was dead, though. He had found the woman he was meant to spend the rest of his life with, and he should've closed that chapter permanently, a long time ago. When he really analyzed his own feelings, after having experienced the love he felt for Mia, he couldn't even say that he ever truly loved Rihanna. There were fun times there, and he'd always have love for her - but she'd never made him feel the way that Mia did. He'd never feared losing Rihanna as much as he feared losing Mia at this very moment.

    Chubbs cast a tentative look back at him. "How are you feeling, bruddah?"

    Drake shook his head in response.

    "Talk it out, man," Chubbs said while steering.

    "I feel...devastated." Drake leaned his head back on the headrest. "I feel like my heart was ripped out of my chest, only the ripper was me because I fucked up. But on one hand I also feel..." He squinted his eyes. "I don't know, something else. Proud of her, maybe? A little in awe of her, which is ironic considering that's what she wants me to feel."

    Tank bobbed his head. "What she's doing, it's not to hurt you."

    "Right, and I understand that. I just...I don't know how I'm going to live without her. I haven't had to do that for a long time now. I'm used to seeing her when I wake up, and before I go to bed. I'm used to cooking with her and shit, you know? And now...she's going to be gone. I don't know." He traced a finger down the window. "But on the other hand, I'm proud of her and in awe of her - the fact that she can just drop me like a bad habit so quickly..." He couldn't stop a small smile from appearing on his face. "Those Rihanna interviews that everyone likes to remind me about, where I said that she made me feel like I was small. Granted, there was a little truth in that, at least at first - but I was playing it up for the cameras. But Mia really does have the ability to make me feel so small. She doesn't have the clothing lines or makeup lines or shoe lines or any ridiculous shit like that. She's just...a girl, really. A talented one, but one whose worth the world hasn't fully realized yet. And yet, she's able to make the man who has the biggest name in hip hop feel like he's the size of an ant in comparison. Just by having the good sense to walk away from me when she should."

    Chubbs arched an eyebrow at him in the rearview mirror.

    "I know. I'm twisted."

    "As fuck," Chubbs confirmed. "A true sicko, self-proclaimed."

    Drake laughed."I don't know how I'm going to make it through this, but...somehow, I feellike she and I are going to be okay. So I'm going to do what she asked me todo: fall back and let her do what she needs to do. All the while, I'm going tobe watching from afar, saying, That's my baby."