Imperfectly Perfect

9. Distractions.

Mishti.

"Can you guys leave us alone for a while? Abir bro?" Kuhu wants others to be out. Yes, I would like that.

"Mishti, baby just look at me. Is everything alright?" I nod but she knows better.

"Come here." She closes the distance between us to squeeze me into her hug. I wince as it aches everywhere and the dam bursts. She pulls back to study me and frowns.

"Get out now. I'm in no mood to take in what you've got to say. I already had an hour lecture from the doctor." My voice broke badly while I struggle not to let the tears fall out of my burning eyes. A moment later, it falls freely over my cheeks and I couldn't stop them.

"Oh baby." She pulls me back to her and rocks me gently, asking me to relax.

"I know it wasn't the best of me but I tried. I really did Kuhu."

"Yes Mishti. You tried, you're still trying. This is going to be fine. Believe me."

"Should I stay here, in the hospital?"

"No Mishti. That's not needed. You're good. Hashtag perfect." Her convincing skills doesn't works for now.

"Divya doc wants me to have some therapy's again"

"How long?"

"Couple of sessions. I doubt that though." I'm hating it already.

"I'll be with you. Just don't worry about that. You've come a long way Mishti, don't just jeopardize it for nothing. We will do this, even much more times, so that you don't come back to this situation again." She stops me when I try to speak. "No. Don't speak anything, everything would be just a bullshit. You want some real food?"

"No, thank you." I gather my thoughts. "Did everyone leave?" Abir was wandering in the hospital from the morning, still on the same outfit as yesterday meaning he was here all night and the morning.

"I wish they'd. Let me check." She gets her phone to call them but has got a message that they were gone.

I lay there on the bed for rest of the day thinking about anything and everything that has possibly got me to this state. I'm nothing less than an idiot, letting things affect me so easily and giving them so much power over me. It wasn't my fault, I did nothing to be in this situation, then why the hell am I here? Only because of me. I'd enough of this hospital visits which depresses me even more, which makes me aware of my weaknesses. I'm ready to scream my lungs out but I have mother, who is looking at me just a few feet away, sitting on the visitors couch. I also had to endure a whole of my family, visiting me from the morning. I know they had this very good intention of checking on me, but for god's sake I needed some time off. Some peace. That is very much rare in a joint family if should say.

Doctor wanted me stay another night at the hospital to complete my dose of medication. I puked my whole of lunch because my stomach was still not ready to accept the food and my mind was fuzzy. Perhaps it was the medicines. Its long time I took them for anything. I am definitely not the one who keeps up with the tablets and stuffs. I hate them, they are difficult to take and my mother dearest is sitting there, daring to say no to the food that has to be taken before the medicines.

Kuhu stayed near me the entire time, helping me break off my chain of thoughts. Effectively doing so, she sat beside me watching reels. I don't usually let anyone near me while I'm sick, but then Kuhu is an exception for everything. She's been through all with me. Not that again, I hit myself mentally.

"Hello, may I come in?" I find Abir's father standing by the door. Kuhu gets up to open the door fully to let him in and I sit up quickly.

Kuhu came back to me to adjust my bed and certainly she must have known him but I'm not sure.